Blood Ties
by Bell
Summary: AU,Written before OotP. Evil is rising.The pure blooded will join, or die fighting it. What happenes when James's father makes the wrong choice?Will his son fight for his life?and the girl he loves? JL SiriusNarcissa RemusArabella Pls Review! ch20 up!
1. The begining

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Blood Ties.

A/N: today is a day for mourning for the ones we loved and no longer here. It is a sad time for me for many reasons. That's one of the reasons I chose to start a new story today. It might be a little slow at first because I want to finish some of my oldest stories but I'll try my best.

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This for Amihai: who is the man with the longish reviews. I want to thank you for not laughing at me. I hope you'll enjoy this. It may not be as good as 'Under cover' but I promise to do my best. You know what you mean to me (right?) and you are my muse…

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Summery: In that time you lived in fear from the killings. The old families, the pure blooded, decided to keep it that way. However, their sons and daughters refused.

This is a L/J story but you will see Sirius and Remus and…not telling at that point.

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Rating: I decide that it will be R because of language and serious themes. I might change my mind tough…

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Disclaimer: I don't own anything you recognize…I'm just playing with them.

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Please read and review!! Enjoy!!

**After reading book five and this story again I realized that it was too late to rewrite. This is completely unfitting for book five plot and also has Sirius/Narcissa in it. I'm sorry if this offend you but I chose to keep it that way and I hope you'll still enjoy!!

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Chapter 1: The beginning.

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Sirius black sat on the sofa infront of the fire. He didn't notice his godson untill the young wizard stood right next to him.

"God, Harry! Are you trying to kill me?"

"Sorry…" Harry laughed. "I just found some photo in my parents album and I thought you could tell me about it."

"Sure, let me see."

Harry handed him the picture and Sirius gasped. Has it been that long? It was a picture from the last Christmas he had at the Potters manor, right before all hell broke loose.

"Who is the girl next to you? She seems familiar."

"Yeah, it's possible that you met her." Sirius sighed.

"Sirius, you promised to tell about my parents, remember?"

"Now?"

"Yeah," Harry smiled. "You said you'll tell me about your last year."

"Alright…" Sirius nodded. "Have a sit."

Harry sat next to him and Sirius stared at the flames again, thinking of a place to begin with.

The black haired wizard sat next to the window, watching the street bellow him. It was very cold, even for December, and the young wizard reached out for his black warm cloak and wrapped himself with it.

Living alone wasn't very fun. He felt extremly lonely in his small apartment. That rat hole was the only thing he could affored himself. He prefered living in that small place over the orphanage.

It's been almost three months since his parents died, murdered. Why? They died because they loved each other. His father was a wizard, an auror and his mother was a muggle, a doctor. She treated his father when a muggle car hit him. They loved each other until the day they died. They died happy, he knew that.

But it didn't matter to him. He still missed them. He watches his friend with his parents and he is jealous. His friend's family is old, rich and famous, no one could harm them.

A loud noise came from the door and it opened quickly revealing a tall man who seemed very disturbed.

"James…" The wizard smiled.

"Don't you ever clean?" came the sarcastic answer.

"No…" he smiled again. "But I cleaned the window's edge so you can come and sit with me if you like."

"Sure!" the young wizard joined his friend by the window. "How are you doing, Sirius?"

"Fine, I guess." Sirius shrugged. "What are you doing here?"

"I came to invite you over for Christmas. I invited Lily, Remus, Peter and I also invited your secret crush."

"Well, if you invited her then it's probably not a secret anymore." Sirius growled.

James laughed and they sat quietly for a while. To a stranger they would have seemed like brothers. Black hair, only one of them had a long smooth hair and the others hair was all messy. They were both tall and handsome. And they were best friends, for almost seven years now.

"You look upset." Sirius observed.

"I am." The other wizard sighed.

"Is it Lily? Did you had a fight?"

"It's my father. He wants to talk with me tonight."

"So? I don't get it."

"When my father wants to speak with me, that usually means he wants to fight with me. James, fix your hair. James, stop being a little boy…" James immitated his father's strict tone and Sirius laughed.

"He doesn't know about you and Lily, right?"

"Good Godric, of course not." James rolled his eyes. "I mean…come on, he might get a heart attack. Hell, I might even marry her and to his opinion my kid will be…" James gasped dramaticly. "A half blood…"

"He won't be a half blood cause Lily is a witch…"

"Yes but Lily's parents are muggles and my father thinks muggles don't have red blood like the rest of us…"

"So, you wanna marry Lily?" Sirius grinned slyly.

"What? What are you talking about?" James tried to cover but his face flushed.

"Aha! You do! I knew it."

"Come on, Padfoot I can't marry her, you know that." James turned serious.

"I know that, yeah. The question is: does Lily know?"

"Of course not…I can't tell her that, I'll break her heart."

"Seriously, Prongs, I think you should tell her."

"I can't, you know I can't" James was angry. "Besides, I'm trying to get out of this mess."

"I hope for your sake…"

"So, you'll come for Christmas, right?"

"Yeah, sure." Sirius smiled and looked out the window again.

"Hey, do you wanna come over tonight? You could stay untill Christmas."

"I don't think so, James. Your father doesn't like me very much."

"What do you care? You're my friend not my father's."

"Still, I rather be here. You're father is afraid that Voldemort will kill me when I'm at your place."

"Look, Sirius, you know my father is old and…he's not use to…new traditions."

"I'm not offended, James, Don't worry. I'll see you at Christmas."

"Yeah, o.k, my parents won't be home at Christmas eve so you'd better come."

"They are leaving you alone in Christmas?" Sirius exclaimed. "Oh, poor Jamsie…" he mocked.

"Shut up, Sirius." His friend frowned.

"O.k, I'll see you in a week." Sirius grinned.

James walked out from the apartment and Sirius continued staring from the window. He saw his friend waiting next to one of the stores and then a beautifull redhead joined him. They smiled at each other and James held her tightly, picked her up and twirled her around, laughing.

He watched as Lily Evans laughed and yelled at her boyfriend. James let her go and then enveloped her in his arms again and kissed her softly.

Sirius smiled. His friends were happy, they loved each other for a long time now. But for how long? How long will it take her to realize that she could never have him?

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Please remember to review!!

Also, english is a second language for me…so be nice!!


	2. Conversations

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Chapter 2: Conversations

The blond witch sat alone at the coffee shop. She ordered orange juice 15 minutes ago. What was taking them so long? Did they go to find an orange tree? Sighing, she looked at her watch again.

The sound of laughing startled her and she smiled. Looking towards the door she saw her friends coming in and walking towards her table.

Lily Evans, a tall, redhead girl hugged her friend tightly. "Hey, Narcissa…I missed you so much!"

Narcissa Avery smiled. "Hey, Lily, It's good to see you."

Lily and James sat down in front of her and James shook her hand.

"God, Narcissa, I missed so much." He gushed, grinning wildley.

"Shut up, James, you saw me last week."

"What? Cant I get all excited like Lily? Is it a girl thing?"

"Yes." Narcissa grinned at him.

"Well, what if I'll tell you that I'm a girl." He dared them.

"I would have known by now." Lily mumbled and James flushed. Narcissa started giggling, unable to stop herself.

"She got you there, James."

"O.k, will you stop laughing at me…what's up? You're still coming over for Christmas, right?" he asked.

"Sure, I wouldn't miss it." The blond witch smiled. "So are you meeting secretly again?"

"Yeah, I told my dad I'm going to see Sirius."

"I'm amazed he let you out of the house." Lily snorted. "He doesn't like Sirius."

"He doesn't like anyone of my friends, he is an idiot. He only likes you, Cissa, couse you're pure blooded."

"I thought Remus is pure blood too, your father doesn't like him either?" Narcissa wondered.

"No, he doesn't like him for other reasons." James shifted uncomfortably in his seat.

"Oh…"Narcissa and Lily looked at each other but chose not to investigate any further, for now. "Anyway, the reason I wanted to meet you here, is to tell you that my parents are going away for the weekend so if you want to see each other you are more then welcome to come over."

"Really?" Lily smiled.

"You wouldn't mind seeing us snogging all over your place?" James asked bluntly.

"James Potter!" his girlfriend scolded him. "At this rate, there will be no snogging…ever!"

Narcissa laughed at her friends. "I wouldn't mind as long as you'll limit your snogging to the room you'll be sleeping in."

"I'm not sure I could handle it…" James grinned.

"Let me know if you're coming over." Narcissa said. "I have to go back home, I'll see you."

"Bye, see you…" Lily and James smiled at her and she walked out from coffee shop. Lily turned to face James and he smiled warmly at her.

"So? What do you think?" she asked.

"I don't know yet." He sighed. "My father wants to talk to me tonight. Let me get trough this and then we'll decide about the weekend."

"O.k." Lily leaned towards him and kissed him softly. He immidiatly responded and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her closer.

He traced her lower lip with his tongue and she smiled to his lips and allowed his tongue to meet her own. She traced small circles on his back and he moaned, pulling her even closer.

"Excuse me…" the waitress cleared her throat. "Did you order orange juice?"

James and Lily looked at each other, their faces flushed.

"Sure!" James exclaimed. "I did." The waitress handed him the glass and walked away.

Lily eyed him with suspicion. "You didn't order any juice."

"Yeah…but I can't walk now…you know…" He flushed again and Lily grinned.

"Oh, you poor baby…I got you all excited?" She purred.

"Get away from me, woman…" he warned and then pulled her towards him for another kiss.

When James Potter entered his house it was late and he knew for fact that his father is pissed. He was supposed to be home for dinner but he lost track of time. It always happened to him when he was around Lily. Beautiful, wonderfull Lily, he loved her with all his heart. They started dating last year, at christmass and James already planned something very special for their first anniversary. He grinned to himself when he walked to his room. The grin faded when he saw his father sitting on his bad.

His father, David Potter, was tall and well built. He was some sort of a business man. He never told James what he did, and after a while the young wizard stopped asking. His mother, Helena, didn't work. She used to spend days in her room and would only come out durring meals. His mother and father never loved each other and as a result from that, didn't really love him.

He remembered the summer he spent with the Blacks. Sirius's parents loved each other with a passion that James never knew. It didn't matter to Sirius's father that the woman he loved is a muggle, he just loved her.

His father cleared his throat and James stared at him.

"Good evening, father. What are you doing in my room?" he asked.

"Where have you been today?"

"I told you, I went to Sirius's place."  


"Oh…and later?"

"What do you mean?" James raised his eyebrows.

"You met a girl…a redhead girl."

"How dare you?" James growled.

"Who is she?" his father asked. "I hope you're not being stupid and falling in love. I know who she is…she's a muggle born." His father wispered the last words, like he was afaraid of something.

James stared at him with horror. "You followed me." He stated.

"No, it wasn't me. Who is she?" David Potter got up from the bad and approached his son. James moved backwards until his back hit the wall. "Answer me, boy!"

"Nothing!" James said, his voice cold. "She's nothing but a whore. We have a great time together and I fuck her every time I see her."

His father backed away from him and then a small smile apeared on his lips.

"Very good, James, as long as you're happy. Just make sure you won't get that mudblood pregnant."

James just stared at him, he couldn't believe his father just said that.

"I wanted to talk to you at dinner. But now that I know that you were…busy…" his father's grin was horrible. "Anyway, there is a formal dinner on Thursday night. A few of the most important families will be there and I want you to come."

"Alright." James nodded.

"Good, you should dress proparly." His father looked at him with criticism. "You should also bring you're betrothal ring."

"What?!" James exploded. "No! I won't do it."

"It's not your decision boy! You should thank me for the chance to meet your bride to be before the wedding."

"I won't marry her! I don't care who she is."

His father slapped him and he stumbled to the floor holding his burning face.

"You will do as I say, James, am I clear?" James just stared at him and David Potter raised his hand for another hit.

"You're clear." James hissed, still holding his cheek.

"Good." His father walked out, leaving James on the carpet.

He got up and walked to the mirror. A huge scartch appeared on his cheek, a result from his father's ring. He sat on his bad and took off his glasses. This wasn't good, wasn't good at all.

*please review!!

I decided to write the second chapter and I hope it answer some questions, REVIEW. And if you have more questions, ask them on your review!!

Lots of thank yous: me, sodpopgirl 703, ank, rosezgarden, blueEyedWildmage, Ravengirl2002, Honey, Amib, luv-jinxy.

Now, answers…no, don't have mailing list, but I'll consider that the moment I'll have more time. To luv-jinxy: L/J will be main couple but you'll see Sirius and Remus and Peter. I just don't think it's possible to write L/J without the rest of them…

Enjoy! 

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	3. Meetings

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Chapter 3: Meetings.

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"What?" Harry's mouth flew open. "My dad was suppose to marry someone else?"

Sirius smiled at Harry's disgust. "Yes, James knew his father is gonna marry him to another woman, but he loved Lily, and he was afraid to tell her."

"But…I don't understand." Harry frowned. "This isnt the middle age or something, people don't force their children into marrige."

"When we were seventeen times were different." Harry noticed the pain that passed in his godfather's eyes. "Voldemort only started his rise to power. At that time, you lived in fear from the killings. The pure blooded families noticed he only kills muggle borns and half breeds so they decided on fighting him with a very original way. They thought that that way they will survive those dark times. However, their sons and daughters, refused to accept the plan."

"So, they conserved their blood lines."

"Yes, they thought that they were safe. But Voldemort only cared about power. At that time, no one knew he is a half breed." Sirius smirked. "Where were we? Oh, well after James's father left him, he walked away to find another victim…

The scream filled the entire house with its agony and James hurried out from his room. He walked quietly across a hall until he got to the living room. His father stood there, tall and looking quite proud of himself. His mother was laying on the carpet, sobbing.

"You will go with me and that thing you call a son to the dinner on Thursday night and you will look lovely and act like my loving wife, is that clear?"

The woman nodded, still crying silently. David Potter walked out from the living room. The moment he dissappeared from his sight, James hurried towards his mother who got up and sat on the sofa.

"Mom?" he asked. "Are you alright?"

His mother turned towards him and he saw the horrible briuse on her cheek.

"I'm alright." Helena said, her face turned angry when she saw the scratch on her son's cheek. "That bastard…" she mumbled.

"Does he always hit you?"

"No, it was the first time. He is afraid of something, I wish I knew what."

"Why did you marry him?" the young wizard asked bitterly.

"I was forced to marry him."

"So, this is probably what will happen to me, either. I'll live a life time with a woman I don't love." James sat next to his mother. "We have to stick together, mom, he is getting more violent every day. We have to fight him. You have to fight him."

His mother paled. "I can't, James." She wispered.

"I'll protect you." He vowed.

"You bearly know me." Helena snorted. "I don't blame you for that." She added quickly at the sight of his angry eyes. "I never bothered to know you cause I thought you'll be just like him. You are almost his mirror reflaction and yet you are so different."

James opened his mouth to reply but then the fire turned green and the flames grew higher. A moment later a tall, young wizard came out from the fire, brushing his black cloak.

"Remus!" James called, a smile on his face. "What are you doing here?"

The brown haired wizard smiled at his friend. "Hello, James, I'm suppose to go to London tomorrow so I thought maybe I could stay here tonight. I don't wanna floo back to Ireland."

"You're welcome." James smiled. "Where are you coming from?"

"I was at Sirius's place but you know…it's too small for the two of us."

"That's not a problem, Remus, I'll go and tell the house elves to set one of the guest rooms for you." Helena Potter got up from the chair.

"Oh, hello, Mrs. Potter." Remus smiled at her, she was always nice to him. His smile faded when he saw the bruise on her face. After she left he took a good look at his friend and noticed the scratch. "James?" he asked.

"Forget it, Moony." James waved his hand to dismiss the issue but Remus still looked at him with worry in his hazel eyes. "O.k…" James sighed. "He slapped me when I told him I refuse to meet my fiance on Thursday night."

Remus stared at him with shock. "James…what about Lily?"

"He send someone to follow us today. I told him she means nothing to me."

"What does she mean to you?"

"Remus you know I love her. I loved her since third year when she purred her potion on my face." James smiled at the memory and Remus chuckled.

"You must tell her then."

"I can't, I will break her heart. I know I can get out from that wedding thing, I just…don't know how." He sighed.

"James…and if you cant get out from it, when will you tell her? On your wedding day?"

James looked at his friend. The words stung, yes, but his friend told the truth.

"At christmas night we'll have our one year anniversary. I want it to be perfect, I want her to remember all the great times we had together. I'll tell her after christmas." He decided and Remus nodded.

They talked for a while and then headed upstairs to get some sleep.

Sirius Black walked all around the grocery store, picking the few items he needed. Black coffee, fruits, bread, cornflaks (the one that tasted like chocolate), milk, butter, hmmm…chocolate chips cookies? He stared at the big package with the wonderfull picture of chocolate chips cookies. He loved them, it was his favourite muggle food.

Sighing, he continued walking, his mom used to make those cookies, home made. He grabbed the milk and then turned over and grabbed the cookies.

He walked slowly to the cashbox and handed his things to the cashier who packed them in a small brown bag.

"Alright, dear, that will be 14.95." The cashier said.

Sirius looked in his pockets and turned red when he found out he didn't have enough money.

"You know what, I'm sorry, I don't have enough money…" he looked in his bag. "I'll pass the cookies." He handed her the cookies package and she put it aside.

"That will be 13.15."

Sirius stared at her with horror, he still didn't have enough money. He looked inside his bag again, trying to decide which one of the items to give back.

"Excuse me!" a very rude, fat, man yelled. "We don't have all day."

Sirius flushed and wanted to walk away from the store and leave all his stuff there but the cashier smiled at him.

"How much do you have?" she asked.

"I…uh…12.55." he said, completely emberassed.

"Well if you'll leave the milk, we could manage."

"O.k, I'm sorry." The cashier took the money he offered her and Sirius almost run away from the store and hurried to leaky cauldron.

The cashier smiled at the young man discomfort and then turned to the next client. The blond girl handed her some fruits and then smiled sweetly at her.

"Can I have the stuff that young man left here?"

"Sure." The cashier handed her the milk and cookies and the young woman left the store.

Sirius organized the little food he bought and then collapsed on the sofa. He was upset. Going to that muggle store wasn't a very good idea. It reminded him of his mother.

He heared a soft knock on the door and got up. He opened the door and stared, completely shock at Narcissa Avary.

"Narcissa? What are you doing here?"

"Hey, Sirius, you forgot your stuff at that muggle store."

"What stuff?"

She handed him the bag with the cookies and milk and he blushed again.

"You saw that? Oh, I can't believe it." She smiled at his embarrassment and then he frowned at her. "Did you buy that stuff for me?"

"No, I told you, you forgot them."

"You bought them." He accused.

"Alright, yes! I bought them! I wanted to come over for coffe but I only drink coffee with cookies so I just had to buy them." She smiled at him.

"You wanted to drink coffee with me?" he turned serious and his eyes held a certain glimpse of hope.

"Yeah…can I come in?"

"It's very small…not your style." He tried to appologize.

"And how would you know my style, Sirius?" she sounded upset and Sirius smiled at her.

"Sorry," he said. "Come in, have a sit."

She walked inside and took a long look around her. It was small, a small living room and a kitchen. At the end of the living room was a door that probably led to the bedroom and bathroom. He had a nice, red carpet that reminded her the Gryffindor color, and a black large sofa. She sat on the sofa and Sirius sat next to her.

"What do you think?" he asked. "I know it's small…"

"It doesn't matter, Sirius." She cut h. "It's still yours."

Sirius smiled at her and noticed the way her paled face flushed.

"O.k…how do you like your coffee?" he asked.

"Black and strong." She said and looked at him. Sirius almost stopped breathing. The way she said that last words made him want her even more then he already have. He swallowed and got up from the sofa.

"Coming, right up." He said.

**Sorry, I know it's not the best chappie…BUT REVIEW!!

Next chappie: More L/J. More Remus. And how does a muggle car get inside this story?

Thanx to my reviewers: raven gal2002, KrazyReader, Citrus scented, Sodapopgirl703, luv-jinxy, FEAngel258, Predolwen, Pajamas, I still have no life =), Psycho chick 4 life. Thank you all so much!!

Luv-jinxy: come on! Don't you trust me?

Pajamas: you have a point there, what I meant was that James's father will see it that way cause Lily is muggle born. Anyway, thanks I didn't think about it that way.

Citrus scented: Wow! Thank you soooo much!!


	4. Close encounters

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Chapter 4: Close encounters.

James stood infront of Leaky cauldron and waited patiantly. He started pacing from one side of the entrance to the other, back and forward, back and forward. Lily was late. It wasn't unusual for his girlfriend to be late, after all she had to travel with those weird underground trains. James didn't like those trains. She once took him in one of those and the ride was inside this tunnel…he felt like he was going to be sick for the entire ride.

But today he was more worried then usual, what if his father got to her? 

He felt like a coward. He told his father that Lily meant nothing for him. How could he say that? He should have been stronger. But he wasn't. Something was weird about his father lately, he began to drink more and became more violent. Trouble at work? James thought. But that was ridiculous…his father was only a business man.

"Hey! Are you waiting for a long time now?" Lily surprised him from behind and enveloped her arms around him.

"I'd wait forever." He said, smiling. He turned to face her and held her tightly, inhaling her scent. He couldn't even begin to admit how much he felt relieved, now that she was in his arms.

"Oh…aren't we charming today?" Lily smiled.

"We are always charming. That's why you like us so much." The wizard smirked.

"Us?" Lily snorted.

"Yes…you like all my 243 personalitys."

"I love all you're 243…I'm not sure that was a word, James."

James grinned and pulled her towards him crushing his lips to hers. The kiss was passionate and forcfull. James wanted to forget everything. He wanted to forget his father and his mother and the dinner on Thursday night and to feel nothing but Lily and her amazing kisses.

Lily deepend the kiss and caressed his back, causing him to shiver. Kissing James was addictive and she never had enough of him. She pulled away for a moment to breathe and then kissed him again, gently nibbling his lower lip. He growled and sent shivers all around her body.

They stopped for air again and stared at each other. James smiled again.

"I love you, Lils…"

"I love you back." She wispered.

"You wanna get in? It's cold."

"I'm not cold." She smirked and then nodded.

They entered the Leaky Cauldron and headed upstairs. They walked pass doors made from dark oak and then stopped infront of room no. 11. James opened the door with the key he pulled from his pocket.

The room was small. A warm fire burned in the fireplace and made the room warm and cozy. Lily sighed and sat on the bed. James leaned against the bed frame and pulled her to him. She snuggled closer and leaned at him, her back to his chest.

They sat in silence, enjoying the quiet.

"Why were you late anyway?" James asked.

"The subway was late and I had a fight with Petunia."

"Really?"

"You know she hates me. She thinks mom and dad love me more then her, it's ridiculous."

"Yeah…" James answered.

Lily remained silent. James knew that silent, she was obviously upset over something.

"Lils?" he asked.

"I wish we didn't have to hide." She said quietly.

"I know…I wish that too." He sighed.

"It's just that…" Lily turned around and faced him. "Sometimes I feel like…a whore." She blurted, James opened his mouth with shock. "We meet at a hotel and that's the only place we can be really alone when we're out of Hogwarts. And I feel like a whore…meeting you in hotel rooms."

James gaped at her for a moment. He turned red and Lily was starting to regret she ever brought the subject. She looked away from him and then he reached out and caressed her cheek.

"Lily…" he wispered. "You know I love you. Please…don't ever say that about yourself. You are the most amazing woman I have ever met and I wish I could be with you forever." James stopped himself and looked at her, she had tears in her eyes and she probably didn't notice his slip of words.

"Really?" she asked, her voice hoarsed. "You mean it?"

"Of course I do." He enveloped her in his arms again. "You know I love you." Lily nodded and kissed him.

The kiss was gentle and brought shivers of pleasure all over his body. He responded by sliding his tongue inside her mouth. He smiled when she moaned to his lips, her tongue caressing his with a rhythm that was so new and yet so familiar.

Soon, Lily found herself beneath James and he was nibbling her neck slowly, passionatly, growling as she sneaked her hands beneath his shirt and caressed his warm skin. He lifted his head from her neck and stared at her. His brown eyes were almost black with desire and he claimed her mouth again, his hands traveling lower.

He opened the bottons in her blouse and admired the black silk bra she wore. Slowly he teased her with his fingers, caressing everywhere but the place she wanted him to touch. "James…" she moaned. She felt him smiling and then he removed her bra and kissed the exposed flesh.

Lily breathed hard and moved her hands to his pants. She tried to pull his pants down but James stopped and looked at her. "What are you doing?" he asked softly.

"I want you…" she mumbled.

James sighed and got up, sitting beside her. Lily's face flushed and she looked away from him. "I can't, Lily." He said.

"You don't want me?" she asked in a small voice.

He laughed and that only made her angrier. "Honestly, I never wanted anyone the way I want you." He answered. "But not here…in this hotel room."

"We've been together for a year." She said.

"Yeah, and we moved slowly cause none of us has much experience with those stuff."

"It's sex, James, can't you say the word?"

He flushed and Lily gigled. "I'll tell you what…" he moved closer and hugged her to his chest, her head resting next to his. "I'm going to have sex with you on our one year anniversary." He wispered, making her shudder.

"I'll be damn…" she faked shock. "James potter said the three letters word!"

James kissed her, laughing. "I'm gonna surprise you even more." He grinned. "On christmass eve I'm gonna…shag you sensless." Lily blushed crimson and he smirked at her. "Aha!! I win…"

And she kissed him again, smiling.

Remus Lupin looked around him with frustration. He tried to find a certain address in muggle London but couldn't find it. He's been runing around in the cold for more then two hours and he got tired and upset.

His mother just had to send him to that particular store. She said that muggles have the best strawberries and she just had to have some. His father needed some muggle pens and papers.

Remus already bought the papers and pens but he couldn't find that store with the strawberries. He sat on a bench to rest for a while. Looking around him he saw a girl and an old woman talking. The girl had black, raven, hair and she was tall and pale.

She seemed very familiar, he had a feeling that he saw her before. The girl was waving her hands in the air and the woman answered her quietly, always keeping eye contact with her daughter.

Remus tore his gaze from the beautiful girl and got up from the bench. He paced towards the road and stopped next to the pedestrians traffic light. He waited for the green light to appear. Behind him he heared the mother and daughter approaching him. He could hear the mother's words.

"You look pale…we should have stayed at home."

The girl didn't respond but Remus's sharp ears heared the air movements as she moved her hands quickly.

"Alright, alright." Remus heared the smile in the mother's tone and smiled as well.

The traffic light turned green and Remus started crossing the road. He still tried to hear the conversation behind him and didn't notice the white car that was going to hit him.

"Hey! What is he doing?" Remus noted the hint of panic and stopped walking.

He looked up and noticed the car approaching him with full speed. His heart raced and he couldn't move. 'Move!' his mind screamed, but he couldn't. He felt a hand pull him backwards and he stumbled to the ground. In his attempet to stable himself he grabbed the hand that pulled him backwards…

Boom.

He fell to the ground and hit his head on the pavement. He moaned from the pain and felt something on top of him. Openning his eyes slightly, he stared at the most amazing blue eyes in the world. They were blue like the sea and he felt like he was drowning in those eyes. Drowning and drowning…he lost his conscious.

"Here is your coffee." Sirius handed Narcissa a large mug with steamming black coffee. Narcissa smiled at him and took the mug.

They sat side by side and drank their coffee. Ocassionally, Sirius glanced at her, observing her lovely features. She was pale with long curly blond hair and light blue eyes. The lips were full and generous and Sirius often dreamed about kissing them.

"So, what's up?" he broke the silence.

Narcissa blushed again and looked around her, she seemed nervous.

"Narcissa…" he smiled. "Whats wrong? You know you can tell me anything."

"Yeah." She breathed. "You're one of my best friends, Sirius." Sirius felt his heart breaking. "Ok, here is the thing…I need a favour from you."

She looked in his eyes and he smiled again, his green eyes twinkling.

"I'm listening."

***Please Review!!

I'm amazed with the support in this story…thank you so much all my reviwers!

I never got so many reviews at such an early stage of the story THANK YOU!!

If you have time and will please review my other stories:

More then magic: complete story that focuses on Sirius.

Under cover: a Remus fic…

Just friends: another L/J…


	5. Musings

Chapter 5: Musings.

First of all A/N: this is for Liat86…thanks for reviewing, however this fic isnt after Hogwarts fic although I understand the mistake. In chap1 Harry askes Sirius if he can tell him about his last year- meaning the seventh year. I also mentioned that Sirius prefered his flat over the orphange, meaning he is still a minor.

The fic time line begins the week before christmass eve and our favorites wizards are on a holiday vacation…

Enjoy this one…

Remus floated peacfully. He was laying on his back, floating in the dark blue lake. Everything was quiet and calm. He opened his eyes and looked up, to the sky. They were light blue and the sun kept him warm.

But something wasn't right. The sky turned grey and the sun dissappeared. Remus felt his body grow cold and started swimming towards the shore. By the time he got there he felt numbness in his bones. He looked for his clothes but couldn't find them. He stood there, shaking all over, with nothing but his wet boxers.

Large drops of rain began purring down on him and he groaned with frustration, what the hell is going on here? And then he saw her, standing right infront of him. She looked like an angel with the white dress robe and the red flowers in her black hair.

But her eyes spoke nothing but sadness and dissapointment. And she looked directly at him, her eyes baring his soul. He wanted nothing more then to take the sad look away from her lovely face. 

She raised her palms and started signaling, her hands cutting the air around her. He couldn't understand her, she was obviously very upset. He started walking towards her but she backed away from him, anger flashing in her blue eyes.

"I don't understand." He said, moving closer to her. "What did I do? Please tell me."

She continued to back away from him. Her dress robe was soaked wet and it clinged tightly to her body, making her beautiful curves even more visible. Remus's eyes traveled on her body and he almost smacked himself…he body had a mind of his own apperantly.

She turned away from him and started walking away. "Wait!" he screamed but she didn't stop.

A strong feeling of lost and sorrow overwhelmed him and he sank to the ground. "No…" he wispered, his hands clutching his head. "No…"

"NO!"

He woke up, sweating and panting and looked directly at the mysterious blue eyes he dreamed of. Relief floaded him and he rised up from his position to try and hug her. The girl paniced and got up from the sofa, knocking down a bottle of water on the way.

"I'm sorry." He mumbled and sank down to the couch, his head pounded and he felt a wave of nausea hitting him at full force.

"What is going on here?"

A dark haired woman entered the room and smiled at the sight of Remus. Her smiled faded when she saw her daughter's frightened expression. She walked to her and stood directly infront of her. "What happened?" she asked softly.

The girl signaled something with her hands and the woman smiled. "I'm sure he meant you no harm, honey." The girl looked at his and he smiled a bit. The older woman sat next to Remus and smiled kindly.

"How are you feeling?"

"I have a really bad headache." He said. "I 'm sorry for startling your daughter, I dremt something and paniced."

"It's quite alright, here, drink some water." She poured him a glass and he drank slowly.

"What happened?" he asked.

"You almost got hit by a car. My daughter pulled you out of the way but she didn't manage to keep you from falling."

"What time is it?"

"You've been sleeping for about two hours."

"Oh my! My parents will be worried sick, I have to get home."

"That's quite alright, I informed your parents." Remus stared at her with shock. "I looked for your ministry I.D in your bag."

"How did you know I was a wizard?"

"Your wand fell from your pocket when you hit the ground." She handed him his pale brown wand. "Rest here for a few more hours, we are not connected to the floo network so you'll need your strengh to walk on foot to Diagon alley."

"Thank you." He said. "I'm Remus Lupin, by the way."

The older woman shook his hand and smiled warmly. "I'm Elizabeth Figg."

"Figg?" Remus wrinkled his brow. "I had a girl in my class with the last name 'Figg' I think her name was Arabella, are you related to her?"

Elizabeth's eyes turned dark and she looked at her daughter. The young girl moved closer and smiled shyly at Remus.

"I knew you looked familiar!" he exclaimed. "What happened to you? Did you transfer to another school?"

Arabella didn't responed, instead, she rested her hands on her mouth and shook her head. Remus raised his eyebrow. She moved her hands and rested them on her ears, shaking her head again. The wizard stared at her for a second before it hit him…she couldn't talk and couldn't hear. He looked away from her and she ran outside.

"Narcissa?"

"Hmmm?"

"I've been listening carfully for about ten minutes now and you havent said a word." The black haired wizard grinned at her and she smiled at him and burst out laughing. Sirius could always make her laugh.

"Alright, here goes nothing." She turned serious again. "What I want to ask from you is very personal and I want you to promise not to tell anyone about it. Not James and not Remus or Peter." Sirius nodded his head and she continued. "When we finish Hogwarts my family is going to marry me with a pure blooded wizard." Sirius chocked on his coffee and Narcissa patted his back gently. "Sirius?"

Sirius felt like he was going to die right there. The girl he loved for almost a year now is going to marry someone else? "I'm fine…" he managed to mumble and she continued talking.

"Well…this is very embarrassing…o.k, I want you to have sex with me."

Sirius dropped the glass and it shattered to pieces.

"What?" he got up from the couch and stared at her.

"I want you to…"

"I heared that!" he exclaimed. "I don't get it, you're gonna marry someone else and you ask me to have sex with you before the wedding?"

"I don't wanna marry someone I don't even know, Sirius." Tears started to form in her eyes and she got up, turning away from him. "They want me to marry a pure blood and I wanna marry someone I choose! I can't resist them…I want to see whats it like…with someone I know."

"Narcissa…" he turned her around so she could face him and sighed. "The first time you…" he tried to find a proper word but couldn't. "The first time you fuck should be with a wizard you love."

Narcissa blushed at his bluntness and looked at his green eyes. "I can't love someone I havent even met. I rather…fuck a wizard I trust."

Sirius sat on the couch and she sat next to him. He pondered his options carfully. Obviously, she is going to marry someone else so a one night stand could be the only thing he'll ever have. The question was, can his heart stand the pain?

Looking at her, he nodded slowly and she smiled. He raised his hand and wiped her tears with his thumb, caressing her face on the way. "Alright…" he said softly. "I'll do it for you." Her smiled grew wider and she hugged him tightly.

"Thank you." She wispered.

"When?" he asked.

"I havent really thought about it." She blushed again.

"Alright…" he grinned. "I'll make plans and let you know."

She smiled and then looked at her watch. "I have to go, I'll see you next week at James's?"

"Sure." He walked her to the door and enveloped her in his arms before she headed out.

"Thank you." She said again.

"Thank you for trusting me." He said softly, caressing her back.

They broke appart and Narcissa tried hard to dissmiss the heat that spread all around her body when he touched her. Sirius went to the window and watched her until she dissappeared form his sight. "Oh god…" he moaned. "Please tell me I didn't make a huge mistake."

Lily walked towards her house, smiling to herself. She had a great time with James today. They were together for almost a year now and his kisses still made her melt in his arms. She had a crush on him since third year and she spilled her potion on his head only to get his attention. When they started going out together he told her that she succeeded.

However, lately she thought he was acting a bit weird. She basicly offered hersto him today and he didn't want her. What was wrong with him? They had a great time together but maybe it wasn't enough for him.

She stopped walking.

Is James cheating on her?

She shook her head and continued walking. That thought was absurd, James loved her and she loved him. They were practicly living together in the head boy and girl dorms and she would have notice anything suspicious. Smiling again, she dissmissed the stupid thought from her head.

But a small seed of that thought remained in her mind and kept evoking dusting memories from rare times when James acted really weird…

**Another chapter…hope you enjoyed. REVIEW!!

I want to thank my reviewers: Liat86, Star, Citrus scented, Kaydee (hello again!), FEAngel258, Amib, Laura Grace and Kali…thank u all so much!!!

A request: Can you guys read and review my story "Under Cover"? it really needs some feedback, thanks! 

  



	6. The formal dinner

Chapter 6: The formal dinner.

Lily Evans's eyes opened when she heared the soft 'tapping' sound that came from her window. The bright rays of sunlight made her half blind and she reached her hand to the window and opened it. The grey owl flew inside and reached his leg for her. She took the small parchment from the owl's leg and it flew away.

Lily opened the letter and read it with a soft smile on her lips.

__

Lils, I'm going to the formal dinner with my parents today. I'll see you tomorrow morning at Narcissa's house.

Love, James.

That was good, she thought. They could spend the entire weekend together. She missed James when they were outside of Hogwarts. James's father didn't like her so they met secretly. She never met his father but James told her that his father would make their lives a living hell if he ever find out about their relationship.

She accepted it and never doubted James's words, until recently. In the past few days she began to question his loyalty and love to her. It was absured on one hand but on the other hand it began to make sense…slowly, but surely all her doubts surfaced.

'Tomorrow' she thought. 'Tomorrow we'll talk.'

"Sirius! Sirius!"

"What?!" Sirius Black raised his eyes from his potions essay and looked with annoyance at Remus Lupin who entered his flat without even knocking on the door.

"What are you doing?" Remus looked shocked and amused at the same time.

"I'm working on the potions homework." Sirius returned his gaze to the parchments.

"You're doing homework? Are you feeling alright?"

"Fuck you, Moony, you know I hate potions…" 

"Yeah, I hate it too that's why I did the essay on the first day of vacation."

"Really? Can I copy?"

"No."

"Come on! I only need…6 inches…" Sirius smiled sheepishly.

"You won't believe who I met two days ago." Remus said ignoring his friend's attempts to copy homework.

"Who? By the way you have a huge bruise on your forehead, are you ok?"

"I almost got hit by a muggle car."

"What?" Sirius paled for a moment. "What happened?"

"Never mind, the thing is…I met Arabella Figg."

"Arabella, the cute girl that was Lily's dormmate and dissappeared?"

"Yeah."

"Well, what happened to her?"

"I didn't quite get it but…something happened to her and she can't hear or talk."

"What? She speaks sign language?"

"And she can read lips. Anyway I thought maybe we could go over there and take her for a day out or something."

"Take her here? To Diagon alley?"

"Yeah, she looks lonely. Besides I'm sue Lily and James and Narcissa would like to meet her again."

"You like her." Sirius observed and grinned at his friend's sheepish smile.

"Yeah, I guess I do."

"Ok, lets go." Sirius grabbed his coat and they headed towards muggle London.

Arabella Figg read a book infront of the fire when she saw her mother walking towards the door. She tore her gaze from the book and looked towards the entrance. She felt her face flush crimson when she saw Remus Lupin standing in the door. There was someone else with him but she couldn't identify him. He looked familiar though.

She looked down to the floor. She wasn't always like that. A long time ago she could talk and hear and laugh. She was once happy. But one day she came home and found her father dead. She also saw his killer…she couldn't believe her own eyes. He was a well respected wizard but he killed her father. She asked him…asked him why he did it and he told her horrible things and he did…horrible things to her. She shuddered as she remembered his words: 'I did it for my lord…Voldemort.' She had no idea who is this Voldemort and she never heared his name again. She fainted and after she woke up she couldn't talk and couldn't hear a thing. She closed her eyes, trying to stop the tears when she felt the presence of someone infront of her.

She opened her eyes and looked directly at Remus's hazel eyes. He smiled at her and she found that she could smile back at him…and forget everything.

"Hello, Arabella, how are you?" he asked.

She hesitated a bit before nodding her head and smiling.

"Good, hmmm…I was wondering maybe you'd like to go to Diagon alley with me and Sirius."

She looked at him confused and then saw the handsome black haired wizard that was Sirius Black. He grinned at her and shook her hand. "Hey, Bella, remember me?"

Remus felt his heart melting as she smiled and nodded again. "Good." Sirius laughed. "So, are you coming with us? We'll go and have some butterbeer."

Arabella looked towards the entrance, her mother stood there, looking at her. She grabbed her notepad and wrote something. Remus read it: 'Is it ok with my mother?'

"Yes." Sirius said. "I mean look at us…we are two charming young man why wouldn't she agree?" Arabella smiled again and got up from the couch. She grabbed her coat and signaled something to her mother. Elizabeth Figg just smiled and asked the boys to bring Arabella back before dark.

Arabella inhaled the cold air as they walked together towards Leaky Cauldron. Remus and Sirius tried to talk with her as they walked and she often nodded and smiled at their jokes. They changed so much…they were practicly adults. She couldn't help but wonder…did she change like them?

James walked around the hall that was filled with old and boring wizards, drinking a glass of white wine. He was under age, yes, but he didn't really care about it. He was about to meet his fiance and he needed as much alcohol in his body as possible.

What a nightmere…he thought. He wanted to see Lily. He needed to see her. Deep down inside of him he knew that it was too late. He should have told her before but he was an idiot…a complete ass.

He leaned against the wall and looked around at the wizards and witches that surrounded him. A familiar voice distracted him from his musings and he looked to his right. His father stood there and talked to a man with short silvery hair. He walked closer in order to hear the conversation.

The man with the silver hair was Thomas Malfoy. He had a son that was older then James in a couple years and was quite a trouble maker. The bad kind of trouble maker. 

The two grown wizards spoke quietly and James concentrated hard and tried to hear.

"No…I will not do it." David Potter hissed.

"You are a wise man, Potter." Malfoy wispered. "You know what is that about to happen. The time has come. He has been waiting for years and now he is powerfull then ever. The killing will continue…"

"He will not dare to hurt me."

"He killed one of you before…he killed the Blacks, right? Their son is the only one that's left and he will die too."

"NO! I will not join you…he wouldn't dare hurt the pure blooded. You said it yourself, Malfoy…he wants to clear the wizarding world from the half breeds and muggle borns…he will not harm us…"

"You are a fool!" Thomas Malfoy walked away, leaving David Potter standing in the corner, cold sweat covering his body.

James's eyes widened and he walked away from the wall. His heart raced. 'Joining who?' he asked himself. His father seemed afraid…he seemed terified. He kept walking around the hall until his father called him.

"James! Come over here!"

James obeyed and walked towards his father. His father smiled his best fake smile as he introduced his son to the two elder wizards that stood infront of him.

"Mr and Mrs Avery…this is my son, James Potter."

James smiled politely and shook their hands. 'Avery?' he tought. 'Isnt that Narcissa's family name?'

His father's grin grew wider and he looked at his son. "James, I would like you to meet your fiance: Narcissa Avery."

James's eyes widened and he glared at Narcissa who seemed shocked and afraid.

"Shake hands." Mr. Avery said and they shook hands.

The grown wizards left them alone and they stared at each other.

"I had no idea it was you…" Narcissa mumbled.

"Shit, Narcissa…I can't marry you…" James wispered.

"I know…what are we going to do?"

"I wish I knew…"

*And that's chapter 6 for you! As you probably realized by now they are at their seventh year and currently on a christmass holiday…sorry for all the mix up…

*Please read my story "Under cover" it's a Remus story Rated R and I'm sure you'll love it, pls give ita try!!

Thank you all my reviewers: Citrus scented- you are the best!!, Luv-jinxy, star, sodapopgirl703, Raven-gal2002, Amib, Laura Grace and Kali, lilybird…

Thank you all!!


	7. Lord Voldemort

Chapter 7: Lord Voldemort.

Narcissa Avery paced back and forward. She surrounded the green sofa and stared at the flames for a moment before continuing her pacing. She was nervous as hell. She and James couldn't really talk last night and she knew that they had to find a way out of those horrible marriage.

The flames turned green and grew higher. She watched James Potter enter her living room, brushing his black robe. He smiled weakly at her and then sighed.

"My father almost kissed me when I told him I'm going to see you." He said. Narcissa frowned and sat next to him on the couch.

"This is not good." She stated and James snorted.

"No kidding…please don't be offended, Cissa, you're a great catch but I can't marry you. I love Lily."

"I know." The blond witch smiled sadly. "Listen, James, you might be able to get out from this…thing but if I won't marry you then I'll be forced to marry someone else."

"Why? I mean why can't you get out from it too?"

"Look, I knew for a long time now that I suppose to marry a pure blood wizard. My parents don't care who he is as long he is a pure blood."

"How do you know that?"

"I heared them talking. I don't know why but they want to perserve the family blood or something."

"Its not new." James shrugged. "Many old families are doing it, I guess our families liked the idea."

"No, they talked about some wizard…can't remember his name. My father said that they should marry me with a pure blood wizard in order to please him. Anyway, I can't get out from it…I don't have anything to fight for." She looked upset and on the verge of crying and James hugged her tightly. He wanted to give her some hope. He wanted to tell her that Sirius was madly in love with her…but he couldn't. He couldn't tell her about Sirius.

Someone cleared his throat and they broke apart. James's eyes widened with fear when he saw Lily standing in front of them. Narcissa backed away from him and smiled at her friend. "Hi, Lily." She got up from the couch and aproached Lily.

Lily frowned for a moment and then smiled. "Hey, what's going on?" she asked.

"N…nothing." James tried not to stammer.

"Are you sure? Cause you guys seemed like you were in a middle of something."

"No, were fine." James said too quickly.

"Oh…" Lily looked at Narcissa with question in her eyes and the blond witch sighed.

"It's my problem…I had a rough night last night and James helped me."

"Do you want to talk about it?" Lily's eyes were full with concern.

"Later. I'm gonna get some reading done in DADA. Make yourself comftrable." She smiled at her two friends and left the living room.

James looked at his girlfriend. She looked wonderfull, her dark, red hair was spwarled on her shoulders and she wore Jeans and a long white shirt. In her hands she held her bag and a long brown coat. He smiled at her and got up from his sit on the couch.

"Hello." He enveloped her in his arms and held tightly.

"Hey." She wispered, caressing his back. "I missed you."

"It's been two days." He chuckled and she hit him playfuly. "But I missed you too"

They broke apart and kissed tenderly. Lily's lips were warm and gentle and he sighed when they met his. She deepened the kiss and James felt like she was healing him. He could easily forget all his worries when she was in his arms.

They broke the kiss slowly and smiled to each other. "Wanna go outside to the garden?" he asked.

"It's December, James, it's freezing outside."

"I'll keep you warm." He smiled slyly.

"You'd better." She grinned and they headed outside.

Remus waited outside Leaky Cauldron. It was really cold and he paced all around trying to warm himself. Occassionaly, he blew on his bare hands, trying to warm them. He waited in the muggle side and the car horns made him jump. He felt a hand on his shoulder and turned around, panic in his eyes. Arabella, stood there, cuddled in a warm, long, black coat. She smiled to him and wrote something on her paper pad.

"Are you afraid of cars?" he read it outloud. "Of course not!" he exclaimed and Arabella smirked. "Alright…" he shrugged. "I don't really like them now. Come on, Sirius is waiting for us." They walked inside and then walked pass the brick wall that led to Diagon alley. They walked a few meters and found Sirius waiting for them in the corner, next to the Quidich supplies store. He was staring at a new broom.

Remus smiled at the sight of his friend and nudged Arabella who smiled too. Sirius felt that someone was looking at him and he tore his gaze from the broom and looked around. When he saw his friends he walked towards them, smiling.

"Hey, how are you doing?" he asked, making sure Arabella saw his lips.

Arabella smiled and Remus talked. "I guess were ok, how are you? Are we going to Narcissa?"

"Yeah, her parents are out of town somewhere so she invited us for lunch. They'll be happy to see you, Bella." Arabella smiled again but she seemed a bit worried.

"Don't worry, you'll be fine." Remus grinned.

They headed to the owl office in order to use the public floo network. Sirius wistled and Remus smirked at him. "Why are you so happy?"

"Can't I be happy?" Sirius said in mock anger.

"Ah, I get it…you're happy cause you're going to see Narcissa."

Sirius turned red and replied. "Yes, I'm happy about it."

"You're hopeless, Padfoot, she's probably engaged to a rich wizard."

"How did you know?" Sirius stopped walking and Remus faced him, shock evident in his eyes. Arabella walked a little bit forward and then stopped when she noticed they werent walking with her.

"She is engaged?" Remus asked. "I didn't know…I was…guessing. Her family is very strong in the wizarding world."

"She told me a few days ago. I really like her, Moony and if she'll show a faint sign that she likes me just the same then I'll do anything in my power to stop her marriage." Sirius stared at his friend and Remus nodded.

"I'll help you. All you have to do is ask."

Sirius smiled at him and then spotted Arabella who stood a few meters in front of them, her head facing the other direction. "Hey, Bella!" he called.

"She can't hear you." Remus reminded him and Sirius looked even more upset.

"I forgot…" He mumbled.

Arabella stood a few meters from them. She didn't look at them because she didn't want to envade their privecy. She wasn't offended by them, definitely not after yesterday. She had such a great time with them. They drank butterbeer and Remus and Sirius told her about all the pranks they pulled. She couldn't remember having that much fun for a long time now. Someone held her hand and she turned to see Remus's smiling face. "Lets go." He said and they continued walking towards the owl office. 

When they got there Remus and Sirius noticed Arabella looked worried and upset.

"What is it?" Sirius asked her.

She looked at the fire places and then averted her eyes and looked at the floor. Remus put his index finger under her chin and made her look at him. "You don't like using floo powder?" he asked.

She smiled sheepishly and then nodded. "Don't worry, I'll hold you tight, ok?" she hesitated for a long moment and then nodded. They walked towards the nearest fire and Remus held her firmly against his body. Arabella burried her face in his chest and closed her eyes shut. Remus smiled softly and then threw the powder around them.

"Avery mansion!"

Sirius smiled to himself when they dissappeared and grabbed some powder for himself.

James and Lily were in the middle of a heated disscussion. No words were spoken but still…they spoke without words…

James's shirt was somewhere on the floor right on top of Lily's shirt and bra and he was busy kissing her creamy breasts, marveling the amazing taste and texture. Lily sighed and arched her back. His heated body caused her shivers and she wanted him more then ever. She moved quickly and James found himself on his back. She smiled sweetly at him and kissed his neck slowly, causing him to moan and pull her closer.

She moved her hands and mouth lower and started unbottoning his jeans. James sighed again. She expected him to stop her but he didn't and her heart started beating even faster. She took of her pants and he took of his athey sat back on the bed facing each other.

"Are you sure?" he asked.

"I've been sure for a long time now." She smiled. "But you wanted to wait untill christmas."

"Yeah, I have big plans for christmas." He grinned at her. His conscience started bugging him and he just stared at her. He wanted her, yes, and he might as well just do it. But then what? She'll think he just used her…James closed his eyes and felt Lily's arms enveloping him.

"We can wait." She offered and he smiled.

"I want you so much." He said. 

"I want you too, but I guess I could manage for five days."

James opened his mouth to responed when someone knocked on the door.

"Hey, love birds, come on down. We have a surprise for you." 

"We'll be right there, Sirius." James called. "To be continued…" he wispered to Lily.

"Arabella?" Lily's mouth open with shock when she came down stairs. James and Narcissa wore the same expression. "Where have you been?"

"Hmmm, guys…Arabella can't talk and doesn't hear a thing…" Remus said.

"What? Why?" James asked.

"I didn't really got it." Remus said.

Lily smiled to Arabella and then started signaling her with her hands. Arabella smiled and responded.

"Lily?"

"What? I always wanted to learn a second language, so I did. Arabella says she's very happy to see you guys."

"You have to teach me!" Remus exclaimed.

They sat in the living room, talking and laughing and then James remembered something and took Sirius aside.

"Sirius, how did your parents died?" he asked bluntly.

"What? You know how they died!" Sirius hissed.

"You told me they died in a car carsh but last night I heared my father talking to Thomas Malfoy…" James told Sirius about the conversation and the young wizard sighed.

"This is a secret." He said. "The ministry doesn't want anyone to know. You probably heared the rumors about a new dark power rising?"

"A few rumors, yes." James nodded.

"My parents were killed. The aurors are guessing that my parents were killed for two reasons: one, that my father was an auror and the second one that he married a muggle and reprouduced a half breed." Sirius's face turned red from anger and James stared at him with disbelieve.

"But Sirius, what kind of a madman would do such a thing? Who is this guy?"

"I'm not sure…I think he calls himself Lord Voldemort."

On the other side of the room Arabella's glass shattered to pieces.

**Wow, that was very long!! I hope you liked it!! Please REVIEW!!

Thank you: Star, Luv-jinxy, KrazyReader, FEAngel258, Sodapopgirl703, TraSH

THANK YOU ALL!! PLS REVIEW!


	8. Black night

Chapter 8: Black night.

Silence.

A loud silence.

In Arabella's mind the silence screamed at her, filling her mind with unbearable noise. It was shocking, to hear something after all this time. But between all the noise and the screaming one name surfaced clearly…Lord Voldemort. She tried to stop the voices, tried to stop the violent attack on her mind. Her vision blurred and she felt the glass shattering in her hand.

She opened her eyes and stared at her bleeding palm. She was calm and felt nothing but numbness in her hand. The feeling wasn't new to her. She didn't feel pain for four years now. She didn't feel pain or happiness or sorrow for such a long time…

She saw Remus, Lily and Narcissa hurring towards her and Remus held her hand and examined it, worry in his hazel eyes. She jerked her hand away, fear in her eyes. She could feel him and she stared at him with shock. He was warm and his skin was soft. Arabella's eyes filled with tears and she realised that her hand burned. She could feel the sharp pain caused by the glass and could feel the blood that streamed from the huge cut on her palm.

Remus held her hand again and covered her hand with wet cloth. The bleeding stopped and she looked at him, wonder in her eyes.

"What happened?" James and Sirius entered her line of vision and she read James's lips.

"I don't know, the glass just shattered in her hand." Lily said.

"Are you alright?" Remus asked her and altough she couldn't hear him she noticed the softness in his question. She stared at him and then nodded slowly. "What happened?"

She tought for a moment and then shrugged.

Sirius looked like he was in deep thought and he looked at her with question in his eyes. She met his gaze and waited for him to talk.

"Did you read my lips when I talked to James?" he asked and she shook her head and signaled something with her hands."

"How could I?" Lily translated. "You were standing with your back to me."

"Then you didn't see me saying the name 'Voldemort'?"

Arabella backed away from him like he hurt her and put her hands on the sides of her head, covering her ears. She gave a strangled cry and Remus held her tight.

"Stop that!" he accused Sirius.

"I didn't do anything." Sirius stared at Arabella with shock. It seemed like she knew the name. Parhaps he wasn't the only one whose life being ruined by that bastared.

"Who is Voldemort?" Lily asked.

"He is a new dark wizard." Sirius explained. "He's been rising for several years now but the ministry is trying to hide it. No one really knows what he wants. I think he'll rise to power in a big action that will kill many."

The others stared at him, wide eyes and open mouths. Sirius felt like he ruined the evening and he turned red. "I'm sorry." He mumbled.

James patted his shoulder and Lily stared at him, her green eyes sad.

"How do you know so much about him?"

"He killed my parents." Sirius wispered.

His friends stared at him, now understanding the depth of their friend's loss. Arabella averted her eyes from Sirius and felt tears streaming down her face. She wasn't the only one…the dark man touched other lives as well. With shock she noticed that she could taste the saltness of her own tears and that she could feel Remus's strong arms around her. 

"Oh my god!" Narcissa's voice broke the silence and they looked at her. "My parents! They know him."

"What?" Sirius growled and looked at her. She shivered at the intensity of the hatered she saw in his eyes and she backed away from him.

"Sirius…" James held his friend who was about to grab Narcissa and milk information out of her.

"I don't know how…they know him…" Narcissa stammered, truly afraid from Sirius's reaction. "I heared them talking, they want to marry me with a pure blood wizard in order to please him."

Lily gasped. "What? Narcissa? You never told me. Who is this guy?"

James and Narcissa exchanged fast look and Narcissa looked down at her feet. "I don't know yet…" she wispered, her eyes tearing.

Sirius gave a frustrated cry and walked out from the living room. They heared him open the door that led to the garden and a moment later heared the door slamming with such force it seemed like the walls around it broke.

"Maybe we should call it a day." Remus suggested.

James and Lily stared at Narcissa. "Do you still want us to stay here?" James asked.

"Yeah, stay." Narcissa tried to smile. "I'll go find Sirius." She said.

"No, give him some time." Remus smiled kindly at her. "He'll come around." He turned to face Arabella. "Do you want to go home?" he asked.

She nodded slowly, wiping her eyes. She smiled sadly and signaled something to Lily.

"I'm sorry, I caused so much trouble." Lily translated.

"No…you didn't do anything." Narcissa said softly and Arabella smiled.

Remus held her hand and led her to the fire place. Once again she burried her face in his chest and found that now she could smell him and she enjoyed it. Remus held her tight and she inhaled his scent. She felt him dropping the floo powder around them and felt his chest moving when he spoke. In his arms she felt safer and braver more then ever and she opened her eyes and watched with awe at the green flames that surrounded her.

Sirius stared at the sky for hours. The light blue color turned darker and the air turned colder. He could see the stars and wished this day never happened. He had to find out the connection between Narcissa and Voldemort.

Shaking, he thought it was impossible. It was impossible…Narcissa was so kind and gentle and beautiful, she couldn't possibley be evil. He walked back inside and noticed that someone left a plate for him. The plate was filled to the top with tomato souce pasta. Sirius's stomach gave an approval noise but he shook his head. He had to find Narcissa first…he had to appologise.

He found her in the living room, sitting in front of the fire. She looked like she was reading a book but Sirius saw that her eyes were unfocused and she seemed deep in thought. He walked quietly, the way his animagus form would do. He stood right infront of her and yet she didn't look at him.

"Cissa…" he said hoarsly.

She raised her head quickly, her eyes alarmed and he smiled sheepishly.

"Sirius…" she smiled weakly but her eyes remained sad.

"I'm sorry for snapping at you. Non of what happened to my parents was your fault."

"Sirius…what if my parents are working for him? What if my parents are responsible for your parent's death? I won't be able to live with myself…" she was babbling and looked a little histerical. Sirius sat next to her and hugged her tightly.

"It is not your fault, Narcissa, you shouldn't pay for your parent's sins."

"You're wrong, Sirius." She said and her cold voice surprised him. "It's always the sons who pay for their father's sins."

He took in the sadness in her eyes and wanted nothing more then taking it away from her beautifull face. Without thinking he leaned forward and kissed her gently. Narcissa backed a way from him and he felt like he recived a cold slap to his face.

"What? What are you doing?" she stammered, blushing.

"I…I thought that if we're going to have sex then we should start with…kissing." Sirius thought she'll ran away from him but to his surprise she leaned closer and kissed him gently. He smiled to her lips and enveloped her in his arms. He traced her lower lips with his tongue and she opened her mouth hesitatly.

Nothing prapered her to the electricity of his gentle touch. He caressed her mouth with his tongue and she met it with her own. His hands caressed her back and she moaned to his mouth, blushing even harder.

Sirius laughed when they stopped for air. He traced her cheek with his finger. "Don't blush around me, ok? Don't be afraid to be yourself around me."

She nodded and smiled at him. She held his face in her hands and pulled him boldly for another kiss.

James and Lily looked out from the window. The night was beautifull and free from clouds. The stars were bright and shining. James sighed as he held Lily. He stood behind her, enveloping her with his arms and inhaling the sweet scent of her hair.

"Are you tired?" she asked him and he shrugged.

"Not really. Somuch has happened today."

"Yes, is it true, James? Sirius's story about a new dark power?"

"I'm not sure. We could ask Dumbledore…he should know."

"Well what ever happens we'll be together, right?"

James smiled and held her tighter. "Forever." He kissed the top of her head and she turned to him and kissed him on his lips, drowning in his warmth.

They broke apart and smiled at each other. Lily turned towards the window again and they gazed at the stars. Lily narrowed her eyes when she saw a shadow flying towards them.

"What is that?" she asked.

James looked at the flying object and recognized it the moment it came closer.

"A black owl…" he wispered.

"What?" Lily asked.

"A black owl…" James repeated, terror in his voice. "Black owls deliver news about deaths…" he stopped talking when the black bird landed on the window's edge and reached her leg out. He tried to reach the letter but the owl moved away from him and turned to Lily.

James froze with horror. "It's for you…" he wispered.

Lily took the parchment with shaking hands and opened it. "We are sorry to inform you…" she wispered and then collapsed on the floor. "NO!!" James kneeled next to her and held her close trying to calm her.

"NO!!"

Narcissa and Sirius broke apart and stared at each other with wide eyes. They recovered a moment later and hurried upstairs.

"NO!!"

Miles away in muggle London, Arabella started sobbing with out any apperant reason. Remus and Elizabeth hurried to her and tried to comfort her but she found no comfort that night. She could feel it…in the wizarding world, it was the blackest night ever.

**Please Review!!!!

I know that Arabella's character is a bit confusing, everything will clear up in the next chapters…

Thank yous…Star, Kristin =), KrazyReader, Julie, Ccilia, FEAngel258…

Destiny's phoenix: no I didn't read/see that play but after reading your review I look it up on the internet and I didn't see any close ties aside from the fact that I mentioned car accidents. The reason I used car accidents is because I think it's something wizards don't really understand…and that's all. Besides that I hope you enjoyed and that you'll R/R…

Luv-jinxy: all I can say is that I'm not very fond with adjectivs and that sometimes I want you, the readers to imagine alone how the characters look and act. However, I'll try to give more feelings as you requested. Thnx, enjoy this one!!

Citrus scented: please don't stop!! I really like your reviews and I hope that if I'll ever write something you didn't like you'll tell me…that's what reviews are for…enjoy!! 

  


  



	9. Darkness arising

****

Chapter 9: Darkness arising.

I want to thank all you wonderfull readers who supported me so much! I hope you'll continue to read and review! NOTICE: I didn't change a thing. This fic is shamless AU, where Sirius and Narcissa are not related and Sirius is a half breed. In short, book five completely disagree with this fic and I'm sorry but it's too late to rewrite.

Flames on that subject will be completely ignored. How ever any other kind of criticism is more then welcome!!

Enjoy!

"Lily, you need to calm down. You're making yourself sick."

"I don't CARE!" Lily sobbed even harder.

James held her tight. She's been crying for about an hour now and he sent Narcissa to find some kind of sleeping potion. Sirius just stood there, statring at the parchment. He read it, again and again and almost refused to believe it. Narcissa came back with the potion and she and James tried to convince Lily to drink it.

"I won't take it." Lily shook her head violently.

"Take the damn potion, Lily."

After a few more arguments they managed to convince her and she fell asleep almost immidiatly. Sirius still held the parchment in his hands and still scanned it when they walked quietly down the stairs.

"Sirius?" James asked him.

"Did you read it?" Sirius asked.

"No. She collapsed in my arms. I didn't get the chance to read it. What does it say?"

"It tells her that her parents were killed by the Avada Kedabra curse and that the dark mark was floading over their house. What is the dark mark?" Sirius wondered.

"I have no idea." James shrugged.

"Well, it's obviously got something to do with that dark wizard you talked about, Sirius." Narcissa sat on the sofa and sighed. "I hope Lily will be alright."

"Yeah, me too." James sat next to her.

"Do you guys think she was the only one?" Sirius asked suddenly, breaking the silence.

"We'll know tomorrow, when the Daily Prophet arrives." Narcissa said darkly.

They spent the rest of the night in the living room, waiting for morning.

"How is she doing?"

"She's still crying." Remus walked out from Arabella's room and her mother, Elizabeth, followed him towards the living room. "She wrote me to get out."

"I don't understand." The older witch sighed. "This thing never happened before, she can't cry."

"What do you mean?"

"When she was younger she saw her father being murdered." Remus's eyes widened and he waited patiantly for her to continue. "She saw the wizard who attacked her father and he hexed her with the 'Cage curse'."

"What is that?"

"It's very old and unfortunatly it has no cure. It makes you enter inside your own body. The curse earased her memory of reading and writing and she couldn't talk, hear or feel any kind of emotion."

"But…" Remus hesitated. "Is it a life time curse?"

"We don't know."

"Cause I think she might felt something tonight. She cut her hand with a glass and she seemed like she was in pain." He said slowly, trying not to rise false hopes.

"I do not know…" Elizabeth sighed again. "I can never thank you enough for what you did for her." she smiled now and Remus blushed.

"I like her." he said softly.

"She might not be able to like you back, Remus. You need to know this. She may be smiling but she can't feel anything in her heart."

"I should get going." He said, he didn't want to hear this. He really liked Arabella and the thought of her not being able to like him back kinda scared him.

"Of course, have a good night, Remus." The witch walked him to the door and closed it behind him. In her bedroom, Arabella started sobbing again.

It was dawn and the dark lord summoned his death eaters. That night was purely a demonstration of his power. Many, many wizards witnessed this power…they were all dead. They, and the rest of their families.

He looked at his most loyal death eater, Thomas Malfoy who returned his gaze with a horrible grin.

"Well?" Voldemort asked.

"It is done. All of them."

"Good…the Pettigrew's should know that they couldn't back away so easilly. Did they honestly think they could change their minds and that I'll let them walk away?"

Malfoy bowed his head. "Of course not, my lord."

"Good, good. Now we have only one more mission to accomplish. Have you talked to Potter, yet?"

"I did my lord, he still refuses."

Voldemort shook his head. "He is a fool just like the rest of them. I'll give him one more chance and only one more. Convince him. Tell him he'll die anyway." The last phrase came out as a hiss and Malfoy backed a way.

"Yes, my lord."

The bright rays of sunlight and the sound of wings almost convinced James that he was in Hogwarts eating breakfast. However, non of Hogwarts students shrieked like that when they got a letter. He opened his eyes and looked at Narcissa who read the paper, her eyes wide and her face white as the wall behind her.

"Oh my god!" she gasped and Sirius jumped violently and woke up.

"What?" he asked.

"Twelve attacks." She wispered, completely terrified. "The Daily Prophet reports of twelve attacks that accoured last night. Twelve families were murdured by the killing curse and their house was burned to the ground." She read from the first page, where a picture of a moving skull with a snake moved all around it. "The murdurer left a mark called the 'dark mark'."

"Auror's headquarters sent her best men in order to catch the dark wizard Voldemort who sent threats to the ministry for quite some time now." Sirius continued to read.

"Let me see the names." James grabbed the paper. "They don't even mention Lily's parents."

"Probably because they are muggles."

"The Pettigrew's…" James read slowly, feeling fear invading his heart.

"Peter's staying at his grandparents, he wasn't home last night." Sirius said. "I can't believe it…Peter and Lily…" he sat back on the sofa and watched the paper. "I don't get it…some of the families who died were pure blooded, why did he kill them?"

"Because he's mad, that's why!" Narcissa said, sounding a bit histerical.

"I need to show this to Lily." James got up and headed upstairs. He found Lily wide awake but at least she stopped crying. He enveloped her in his arms and showed her the paper.

"Sirius was right." She said softly.

"Yeah…we'll go through this together, Lily. I promise."

**Yeah…not the best I know…Review anyway…Please…**


	10. Christmas Eve

****

Chapter 11: Christmas Eve.

A bundle of thank you's…Kaydee, ak, Citrus scented (Thank u, thank u!), Star, FeAngel258, Remy's girl (changed name again? =), KrazyReader, PaDMa…

Luv-jinxy: Yes that was a bit rushed I knew that the minute I finished writing it. I don't aol but I'll love to read your reviews on the review board or you can feel free to e-mail me anytime! I appreciate your reviews. You're not afaraid to tell me when I'm doing something wrong and I like that!

DayDreaner: First of all, I'm honored! That was such an amazing review! At first I panicked and I was quite sure this was going to be one of those flames that counts all the errors I ever made but it wasn't…it was a wonderfull review! About the 'rushed chapter'…yeah, it was rushed I know but I decided to keep it the way it was. Let's assume that Bella's mom didn't cry because she cried too much over the years =) about the time line…I went over and checked it and you were right. I tried to explain it and it's you who is asking the question in Harry Potter's voice, so listen to what Sirius has to say and tell me if it's alright…that's the best I could do! Enjoy!

__

Sirius stared at the fire. He remembered the events of that night like it was yesterday. He remembered Remus coming over to his flat the morning after the attacks and telling him about Arabella's condition. His friend was upset and Sirius felt sorry for them both, Arabella and Remus.

Lily spent the next few days untli christmas at Narcissa's house. She went to her parents house but there was nothing left and her sister Petunia turned histerical at the sight of her so she stayed at Narcissa's. Sirius still havent figured out if Narcissa's parents had anything to do with Voldemort.

"Sirius?" Harry's voice startled him and he stared at the young wizard.

"Yeah…I'm sorry, I spaced off…"

"It's okay. I have a question though…"

"Shoot."

"A few years ago Dumbledore told me that Voldemort was in a state of power eleven years before he killed my parents but you say…"

Sirius smiled. "Dumbledore was right. Voldemort started gaining power eleven years before you destroyed him for the first time. He killed, but not enough to draw the attention of the wizard community. The aurors payed attention and the ministry knew but they all thought he would go away on his own. No one imagined that he would be able to gain so much support and power, but he did."

Harry nodded. "And what happened afterwards?"

Sirius smiled bitterly. "Christmas arrived and with it came the most horrible time of our lives…"

Lily stared blankly through the window. The snow hit the ground gracefully, covering the ground and leaving no trace of the roads that were under it. Everything was white and festive and everyone smiled and cheered…it made her sick. 

Staying at Narcissa was a smart move. They were good friends and Narcissa helped her a great deal. However, there was something very wrong with her parents. They said nothing, actually, they never really payed attention to her or Narcissa but sometimes she cought them looking at her like she was…a mudblood.

And she was. She couldn't deny that. She was a mudblood…and her parents were DEAD!

The realization sank again like every day. Every day she realized again that she was all alone. But that wasn't true, she had James. Smiling softly, she brushed her tears away. She missed him. Missed his warm arms enveloping her and his generous lips kissing her. She'll see him tonight, it was christmas eve and he promised her a great time for their anniversary.

Narcissa entered the room, smiling softly. "Hey, are you ready?"

"Yeah, how do I look?"

Narcissa smiled at Lily's apperance. She wore a long red dress that showed every single curve her body had. The dress highlighted Lily's red hair that was tied up in a loose ponytail. Narcissa wistled wolfishly (is that a word??) and smiled. "You look great. James wouldn't be able to keep his eyes off you, not to mention his hands!"

"Well, I don't want him to keep his hands off me!" Lily smiled softly.

Narcissa opened the closet and pulled her coat out, she wore a blue dress that made her look paler then usuall and for the first time ever, wore makeup. "Hey, Lily…" Narcissa blushed a little. "Have you and James ever…you know?"  


"No…" Lily answered honestly. "I think it's gonna happen tonight."

"Really?" Nrcissa sounded excited. "And what if it doesn't?"

"Then he'll verify my suspicions." Lily said and Narcissa coughed. "That he is cheating on me with Sirius or Remus or Peter."

Narcissa laughed and Lily joined her. "Oh, please…Sirius the ladies man?"

"Oh, come one, Cissa…it's just a show. He must have some kind of secret love waiting for him."

"Yeah…" Narcissa said and found that thinking about it made her sad. She brushed the thought away and they headed toward the fireplace.

James hurried to the living room to find Remus and Arabella brushing their clothes and panting slightly. "Oh, I thought that Lily came." He said.

"Thank you, Prongs, for the lovely welcome." Remus said, smiling.

"Sorry, merry Christmas." James smiled sheepishly.

"Hello!" Sirius showed up and hugged Arabella and Remus in a bone crushing hug. "MERRY CHRISTMAS!" he shouted.

"Aren't we in a good mood?" a new voice talked and they turned to see Narcissa standing infront of them smiling.

"Hey, Cissa, he's gone mad don't pay attention to him." Remus smiled.

"I've always been mad" Sirius protested and then hugged Narcissa, smiling softly.

"Merry Christmas, everyone!" Lily showed up and James stared at her, his jaw falling to the floor. Sirius removed his arms from Narcissa and stared at Lily. Even Remus, who was the most polite and gentelman, stared at her. Behind him Arabella smiled and signaled something with her hands. Lily laughed.

"Yeah, you're right, Bella, I knocked them down…"

"She's mine…nobody touches her!" James exclaimed and hurried towards her, enveloping her in his arms and then spining her in the air. Lily screamed and hit his shoulders. Finally he put her down and smiled at her. "You're amazing." He wispered.

They sat down and enjoyed each others company. After a very long and delicious dinner they came back to the living room and collapesed on the soft couches, too full to even speak. James and Lily sat together on one of the couches and James slowly caressed her hand with his thumb causing her shivers. She was amazed with the sensations he could give her with such a small gersture like caressing her hand.

Sirius, Narcissa and Remus talked with Arabella. She tried to teach them sign language and they seemed to get it pretty well. A few minutes after Narcissa got up and headed to the kitchen again, Sirius followed her. Arabella eyes them with suspicion and then wrote something for Remus. He smiled when he read her note.

"Do you think there is something going on between those two?" He read quietly. "Yes, I definitely think so. Don't worry, I'll milk the information tomorrow and I'll tell you all about it." He winked and Arabella smiled. Remus was very nice to her and she felt that he cared much about her but she couldn't feel the same. It was frustrating, not to be able to feel anything. She turned her eyes to Lily who signaled her something and she replyed, moving closer to the red haired witch.

Sirius found Narcissa in the kitchen, drinking water.

"Hey…" he leaned at the door and looked at her.

"Hey, Sirius." She didn't look at him.

"Are you okay? You look nervous."

"I am nervous." She smiled sheepishly and Sirius responded with his own grin.

After talking with each other they decided that tonight they were going to do the…well there was no other name for it. Tonight they will have sex. Sirius guessed that she would be a bit nervous since this was her first time and didn't want to pressure her. However, he was bagining to admit that he wanted her…especially now after he saw her with that dress. He moved towards her and sat next to her.

"We don't have to this tonight." He said softly.

"Oh, no…I want to…I'm just nervous. I really want to." She still tried hard not to look at him and Sirius caressed her cheek gently. She stared at him, surprise in her . She looked at his green eyes and saw everything she ever wanted to see in a man's eyes. That was the way she always imagined a man looking at her. But he closed his eyes briefly and that look dissappeared, Narcissa thought she imagined it.

"Wouldn't James mind that we're using his guest room?" she asked.

"What James doesn't know can't hurt him." Sirius wispered and closed the gap between them. Their lips met and the touch sent the same electricity through their bodys. Sirius enveloped her in his arms and was almost surprised by her wild response. She was amazing. Her lips were warm and soft and he couldn't wait for the night to come.

Narcissa broke the kiss slowly and stared at him. He caused her to feel things she never imagined she could feel and that was amazing. She smiled at his dark eyes and kissed his cheek sweetly. "Until later tonight…" She wispered and Sirius nodded.

They came back to the living room to find the others very tired and quite bored. Remus was extremely tired due to the full moon two days ago. In a last try to keep them together for a while James suggested that they will write a letter to Peter who was still at his grandparents in America and couldn't come. His grandparents refused to let him come over in fear that Voldemort's followers would kill him and Peter told them that he would only see them at Hogwarts when the holiday was over.

They sat down and wrote him a long letter, describing everything they did and then sent it with James's owl along with another owl that carried Peter's presents. They sat a while longer and then Remus decided that he would be going home. 

The moment he and Arabella were about to enter the fireplace the front door burst open and someone hurried inside. The young wizards stared at each other and pulled out their wands. The front door slummed shot and David Potter screamed at the top of his lungs: "HELENA!"

"How could you do this?" Came the sobbing reply of Helena Potter. "HOW COULD YOU?!"

The two wizards showed up in the living room entrance and David Potter slammed his fist in his wife's face. She stumbled to the ground. "You wouldn't understand…" He hissed. "I had no choice!" he screamed.

"You sold us! You killed your own familly with your own hands!" she shouted.

"Shut up!" David Potter raised his hand for another blow when James screamed.

"ENOUGH! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?"

The two adult wizards stared at their son and his friends that gaped at them. No one spoke for a few seconds and James helped his mother to get up from the carpet and sit on the sofa. When he moved close to his father he could smell the strong scent of alcohol.

"Mother, what's going on?" He asked, trying to mask the anger he felt.

His mother started sobbing, unable to control hersels. "Oh, James…" she moaned. "He took it…he took the mark…we're doomed, all of us…"  


  



	11. Revealing the Truth

Chapter 11: Revealing the Truth.

James stared at his parents for a moment, not registaring a word of what being said. He noticed, however, at the heavy silence that surrounded the living room. No one dared to move a muscle. Behind him, he could hear Lily's breathing that came in short gasps, almost like she was afraid of something. But there was nothing to fear from, right?

A strange feeling crept inside his heart. He knew…that there was something terribly wrong with the way his mother sobbed and his father sat there, motionless. The mark? What was that?

"What are you talking about? What mark?" he broke the silence and startled everyone in the room.

Helena Potter raised her head from her hands and stared at her husband with disgust. David Potter returned her gaze with eyes empty from any emotion. "It's for your own good. I did it for you. That's the only way we could survive…"

"You never think of us, David! You took the dark mark! You joined him! For what? Ha? Tell me! Do you really believe he'll spare you're life? Our lives?"

"James's marriage were not enough for him!" David Potter growled.

"Marriage?" Lily wispered and James quickly turned to her, his eyes wide.

"And what did you think, Lily Evans? That my son will marry you?" David Potter moved closer to James and To Lily who stood next to him. James moved infront of her and blocked his father's way. "My..my…" David snarled. "And I thought she was nothing but a whore…"

James closed his eyes with horror, trying to block the howl of anger that rose up his throat.

Lily stared at James's father with wide eyes. She was determined not to cry infront of him.

"Look at him, Helena, look at our son. His actions might bring the death of us all. I joined him in order to protect us."

Helena cried silently now, still looking at James and his friends. Remus and Arabella stood next to the fire, holding hands and looking with wide eyes and the scene. Sirius stood next to Narcissa who had her head burried in her hands. Sirius stared at James's father with angry eyes and then broke the silence.

"You joined Voldemort. You took the dark mark…the skull and the snake."

"That's right, Black…" David Potter sighed and shot James a dirty look. "Look at our son's friends…he dates a mudblood." He nearly spat the word. "One of his friends is a half breed and the other is a werewolf…the only one here that's worth something is his pure blooded fiance."

The words burned the air in the living room and stayed there…making sure everyone understood everything…

James burried his head in his hands, shaking. 'No…this is not happening…he did not just say all those stuff…NO! I imagined everything…'

But he didn't.

"What did you do?" the snarl came from Helena. She got up from her couch and shoved her surprised husband out from the living room. "We'll talk about it alone!"

James didn't dare raising his head until he heared Lily's voice. "James?"

He looked at her. Her tear stricken face and her shaking hands nearly broke his heart. "Lily...I…"

"Is this true? What he said?"

"Yes." He looked at her when he spoke. "I'm engaged to be married."

"And…all that time…all that time I was nothing but a whore to you?" she wispered, looking directly into his eyes.

"No…Lily, you were never…"

"HOW LONG?" She shouted. "HOW LONG DID YOU KNOW ABOUT THOSE MARRIAGE?"

"Since fifth year." He wispered, now looking at the floor.

"Who is you're fiance?" Lily asked bitterly.

"Narcissa…" a new voice joined the conversation. Sirius gazed from Narcissa to James, realization and hatred reflacting in his eyes. "Am I right?"

Narcissa, who still had her head burried in her hands, nodded slowly, not daring to meet Sirius's gaze. Sirius's usually handsome face twisted as a look of hatred and disgust rose in his features.

"Why didn't you tell me?" He asked her. "After what we were going to do tonight? You were never gonna tell me?"

"Why should I?" she snapped. "You never, ever, offered me anything! You never said you wanted me!"

Sirius turned to James, completely ignoring Narcissa's outburst. "And you? You knew how I feel about her! How could you not tell me?"

James shook his head, tears burning his eyes. Lily turned from him and walked over to Sirius, still crying. No one talked for a while and Remus gazed at each and every one of his friends. There must be some way to fix this mess. He was shocked to hear that James is about to marry Narcissa.

Maybe…just maybe, no one remembers the part where James's dad mentioned him.

But Arabella did. She dropped his hand and moved away from him. Her movement engaged Narcissa and Lily's attention and they looked directly at Remus.

"And what about all the things you didn't tell us?" Narcissa asked him.

"We've known you for so long and you never told us you were a werewolf?" Lily wispered.

Remus didn't know what to answer. For a moment there, James and Sirius moved a little closer to each other preparing to answer the question for him but then they locked gazes and backed away from each other, pain and anger reflacting in their eyes.

"I…I didn't know how to tell you…" He wispered.

"I thought we were your friends." Lily snarled and then turned back to Narcissa. "I thought YOU were my friend!"

"Lily…I…" Narcissa stammered.

"I'm going home." Sirius turned from them and headed towards the fire. Arabella made a movement towrds him and Remus stared with sad eyes when she wrote him a note. Sirius nodded and smiled a sad smile. "Yeah, Bella…I'll take you back to your place." Remus looked away as tears formed in his eyes.

"Bella, can I stay at your place?" Lily stood infront of the dark haired witch and she nodded.

Sirius walked into the fire and soon disappeared with Arabella. Lily grabbed some floo powder when James spoke: "Lils, please listen to me…"

"Shut up, James…I'm not interested…don't bother to talk to me. I never hated anyone the way I hate both of you now…" and with those words she dissappeared.

Remus breathed hard and grabbed some floo powder. James tried to talk to him as well. "Moony…I'm sorry my father told…"

"Yeah…well I'm more interested in knowing how the hell he found out!"

James backed away from the bitterness Remus's voice contained. He never heared his friend talking that way before. He backed away and sat on the couch, Remus dissappeared within the green flames. Burried his head once again in his hands, James started sobbing, unable to contain the tears anymore.

He felt a pair of arms enveloping him in a hug and held onto Narcissa who cried as well. "I've lost them, Cissa…" he chocked between his tears. "I've lost Lily and Sirius and Remus…"

"I know…" She nodded, crying into his shoulder. "I've lost them too…"

**************************

SORRY…SORRY…(drops to the floor and trying to dodge the rotten fruits and vegetebles…) I'd give you my excuses but you don't really care, right?

I had a really hard time writing it…I'm not sure it came out the way I wanted it to be…tell me what you think, okay?

Thank U's…Kaydee, Slytherinheir, Star, Alexandra, Sporty, Hpromancer, Kris, SweetBitter…

Oobergoober, FEAngel258, Sodapopgirl703, Star, Remy's girl, Daisy silk, The lady of shallot, Emma Morgan, Laura Grace and Kali…

Citrus scented- I guess you realized I'm not french by now…(grins sheepishly…)

DayDreamer- Didn't you said you have a confession?

**A finale note…I'm having trouble writing the Remus/Arabella romance for this fic…I thought they'll be perfect for each other but now I think they would be better as friends eventually. I hope I'm not loosing any readers over this…if you want Remus romance (that sounds good when you say that…) try my Remus fic's…you know…click on my penname…**


	12. The Order of the Phoenix

Chapter 12: The Order of the Phoenix.

__

"…And just like that, our own actions brought us apart from each other…"

Harry stared at his godfather with wide eyes. How is it possible that everything fell apart so easilly? He had so many questions to ask but the look on Sirius's face was grave and he didn't dare speak. The silence in the room surrounded them with it's thickness and Harry felt like he was going back in time once more when Sirius breathed shakilly and started speaking again…

Lily looked around her. The platform was packed with students returning to Hogwarts from Christmass vacation. Everyone looked happy and content and screamed to their friends and sat together in the compartments. Lily didn't have any friends…not anymore. She owled Sirius a few times but his letters told her that he was feeling just as misrable and upset as she was so she stopped owling him. Misery didn't want company.

Living at Arabella's place was quiet, literally…and Lily had loads of time to do some thinking and to figure out the fact that she hated James and Narcissa more then everything. Even Arabella's hands motion couldn't persuede her to change her mind. Lily completely lost her temper and yelled at her that she is a hypocrite telling her to think it over when she burned every parchment Remus sent her. Naturally, Remus stopped sending letters after a week.

Remus was another source of confusion. Why did he keep this a secret? He was afraid, of course, that they would hate him. But it hurt her more when she found out that he didn't tell her. They were good friends since fifth year when they were prefects and yet he didn't trust her.

TRUST.

Everything is really a matter of trust isnt it?

James sat alone most of the ride back to school. At some point Narcissa joined him. Non of them said a word. Each of them wallowing in his own sorrow. James's red eyes shoved that he was still utterly sad. He felt like his entire world fell apart in that horrible night.

But between the waves of depression and madness that drowned him that night one resolotion survived…he will fight untill the end. He will fight for his father's soul, he will fight for his life and he will fight for Lily…he will fight till death.

The dim light that bearly lited the compartment was the sign that they will arrive soon. Narcissa excused herself and went to change. James just nodded and wrapped himself with his cloak. The train soon stopped and James hurried to get into one of the carriages. When he saw who already sat there he turned to leave but the compartment door slammed shut and it started moving towards the castle.

Sirius turned his face from his former best friend and looked outside at the darkness that surrounded the castle. He couldn't bear to look at him, it was to painfull. He felt betrayed. The girl he loved and his best friend, both decieved him. He closed his hands to tight fists, hoping that he would be able to survive this trip without beating James.

Remus, who sat next to Sirius, looked out the window as well. He was feeling angry again. It didn't really mattered anymore. When one's so close to the full moon everything make sense and it was James bloody fault. If it werent for him Arabella wouldn't have ran away from him, right? And how else could James's father find out if not from his son?

Peter Pettigrew looked at his three friends with a worried gaze. He obviously missed something when he visited his grandparents. They had some kind of a fight. He should have seen it coming…they kept too many secrets from each other…His train of thoughts stopped when the carriage stopped and James nearly jumped outside moving away from them.

James breathed a sigh of relief when he jumpped outside, he had a feeling that both Remus and Sirius were going to start paunching him when the carriage stopped. The compartment made him feel chained and weak…he could almost see the hatred that rose from his friends. He shook his head…they are not my friends anymore…

He started walking towards the great hall when professor Dumbledore stopped him.

"Mr. Potter, would you mind joining me in my office?"

"Of course, professor." James answered, his voice hollow.

"Good, please wait next to my office and I will join you shortly."

James nodded and walked towards the hedmaster's office. When he got there he was surprised to see Sirius, Remus, Peter, Narcissa and Lily all standing next to Dumbledore's office. He sighed softly and joined them.

After a few moments they heared Dumbledore's footsteps and followed them to his office. He motioned them to sit next to a round table and they sat there in silence each of them staring at everything but the face of the one that sat next to him.

Dumbledore looked at them with raised eyebrows. There was something really wrong with those young wizards. He could almost feel the strong feelings of hatred and sadness that surrounded them. Well, it didn't matter if they hate each other. They were his best students and he needed them to work together. He cleared his throat and started speaking.

"I know that you heared about the attacks that took place at the beginning of the holiday. I'm sure that by now you all know who is the cause of the attacks on your families…"

Sirius snorted. "Some families are hardly in danger, sir." He said, looking at James and Narcissa.

"That is not correct Mr. Black. We are all in danger, even the pure blood famillies. I called you here because you are my brightest students and I want you all to help me, if you are willing." That sentence got their attention and they all looked at him, waiting for him to continue. "Most of you are of age and those who are still not eighteen will soon be. I decided to establish an organization that will help fight against Voldemort. I want it to be independent and completely hidden from the ministry as they are already starting to hide their heads in the sand…" the young wizards smiled at this. "If you are willing then this will be the first meeting of the Order of the Phoenix."

They nodded to him and the old wizard smiled softly and then his smiled froze when Sirius rose from his seat and once more looked at Jame sand Narcissa. "How could we possibly work with you considering who your parents are?" he said, his voice bitter.

"You shouldn't judge anyone according to his parents actions." Dumbledore said.

"Then how should we judge him?" Lily spoke. "We already know they can keep a secret for a long time, right?"

Dumbledore shook his head. This was wrong, they completly lost faith with each other, but why?

"Well, maybe if you all would have been more honest with each other non of this would have happened." Remus stood up as well.

"Honest!" Narcissa got up and faced him. "What the hell do you know about honesty, Remus?"

"I didn't tell you because I knew you'll be afraid of me." He exclaimed and she backed away from him. "And you are afraid, right? Afraid of the big, strong WOLF!" Remus's eyes turned golden and Sirius and James hurried to pull him away from Narcissa.

"Remus, calm down…" Sirius said softly as the werewolf shook his head, tears forming in his eyes.

"I'm sorry…I've never been so angry…"

Narcissa backed away from him until she bumped into Lily who put her hand on her shoulder, trying to calm her down. Dumbledore seemed more relaxed. It seemed like they were coming together again. However it didn't last long and the five wizards backed away from each other, remembering that they still hated each other.

"Alright, that's enough!" Everyone stared at Peter that got up from his seat, looking angry and determined to find out what the hell happened. "Stop acting like idiots! What the hell happened at Christmas?"

A stunned silence surrounded the room and they looked at their friend who seemed upset and angry with them. "Get over it!" he snapped. "We have better things to do…"

****************

Again, I'm sorry for the delay…thank you all for your reviews…

Thanx…SweetBitter, Kaydee, Hpromancer, SamRadcliffe, Sporty, Liz…

Emma Morgan, Daisy Silk, Oobergoober, FEAngel258, Star, Myra, Remy's girl, Citrus Scented, Heather, DayDreamer--I'm still waiting…=), Amandinka, Jennie,Laura Grace and Kali, Lilybird, Sodapopgirl703…

Don't worry…I promise things will get better soon!!

Also, I'm sorry for the mistakes you've seen in this one, I wanted to post it quickly… 


	13. Making it Better

Chapter 13: Making it Better.

**A very short A/N…it's for krazykat who thinks I should get a clue. I don't take flames well but I thought about that and came to the conclusion that I might offended you in some way, never mind the fact that no one else minded that much to write me a flame. Let me say again English is not my native language. And Christmas is not a word in my language and I don't celebrate it! But I did fixed the spelling as you so 'kindly' told me to do. I thank you for teaching me the spelling of a new word and I hope that next time you might actually read the fic and not just flame the author.

Sirius leaned against the large tree that stood right next to the lake. His mind felt blank and unfocused. The meeting definitely didn't end very well. Peter stormed out of the room after he received no reply for his question and Dumbledore looked surprised and dissappointed at the same time and told them to go to their dorms and get some sleep.

When Sirius got to his bed he found a note in Peter's messy handwriting telling him to meet him by the lake. So he stood there and waited for about a half an hour and Peter still hadn't showed up. He was about to leave and return to Gryffindor tower when he heared footsteps approaching him.

However, he was quite sure those weren't Peter's footsteps. Almost seven years of knowing him provided the knowledge that Peter never moved this gracefully. Infact the only one he knew who was capable to walk so smoothly was…

"Remus…" He whispered and the footsteps stopped. A moment later they came even closer and Sirius saw Remus eyeing him suspiciously.

"What are you doing here?" Remus hissed. "I got a note from Peter telling me I should meet him here."

Sirius couldn't help from grinning. "I think Peter set us up." He said.

"You're not the only one." Another whisper came and the air infront of them seemed to be moving as James removed the invisability cloak from his body.

His two friends glared at him. "What are you doing here?" Sirius growled.

"I got the same note from Peter, telling me to meet him here." James shrugged.

"Alright, I had enough!" Sirius started walking away when James stopped him.

"Wait a minute, please." James looked at them both. "I know that you're extremly mad at me but I want to explain, I…I need to explain. If you guys could just…I don't know…hear me out for a second…"

Sirius was about to turn away and leave but Remus sat down on the grass and James sat infront of him. Sirius sighed and joined them. "I don't see the point…" He muttred.

"It's a good place to share secrets." Remus sighed. "This is the exact place where you three cornered me and made me tell you what I am." James and Sirius shared a look and Sirius nodded.

"Alright…I'll listen."

James opened his mouth and then closed it, finding it hard to even begin. His friends stared at him with amusment and after a while he sighed with frustration. "I don't even know where to begin…"

"Alright…then I'll begin…" Remus said and his friends heared the bitter tone in his voice once more. "How did your father figure out I was a werewolf?"

"Oh I don't know Remus!" James shook his head with frustration. "I don't know where he works. He never tells me anything. Maybe he has excess to the ministry files and after all, you're listed in the ministry! Why would I tell him such a thing? You've seen the way he was talking to me. He hates my guts! He wishes he had another son who won't be a blood traitor like me!"

Remus and Sirius stared at him, amazed by this sudden outburst. But now, after he started talking, James felt like he'd explode if he won't take it all out." And you!" He turned to Sirius. "I see you as my brother and up untill Christmas I thought you felt the same, did you honestly think that I'll lie to you like that?"

"But you did lie, James! I knew you were getting married but you never told me it was her!"

"I had no idea it was her. We only found out at the formal dinner a week before Cristmas. We just…didn't know how to tell you guys and then everything happened so fast…I never thought my father would be the one to reveal everything."

They sat in silence for a while. The sounds of the night surrounded them. James could hear the wind blow and the leaves moving but he didn't dare raising his head.

After a long, heart breaking silence, Sirius spoke. "I suppose I might have been too mad for my own good. I felt betrayed…by you and by Narcissa and…she was right, you know, I never said anything that'll prove that I have feelings for her that are more then friendship like and I'm really sorry for that."

"I can't marry her." James said bitterly. "I love Lily. I was hoping that maybe, just maybe I'll manage to get my self out from this mess…"

"Well, I suppose that the first step will have to be to convince Lily to talk to you." Remus almost grinned and James looked at him with surprise.

"So you guys…talking to me again?" he asked hopefully and his two friends nodded.

"I'm sorry, mate." Sirius smiled sadly and James nodded.

"I'm sorry too."

"What was that noise?" Remus turned his head and the others followed the direction of his gaze just in time to see Wormtail turning into Peter Pettigrew.

"So this is what happened!" He exclaimed.

"You set us up!" Sirius accused.

"Yes…and you should thank me for that." The short wizard smirked.

"Thanks Peter." James smiled and Peter sat down on the grass next to them.

"Look you guys…I wasn't here when my parents died so I guess you can say that all I have left here are you guys. I couldn't protect my familly but you are my best friends and I'll do _anything_ for you guys, I mean it."

His friends stared at him for a few moments, each of them sensing that those words were strong and powerfull and meaninigfull. No one thought that the true meaning of those words was closer than it seemed.

Remus smiled sadly. "I'm sorry for your parents, Peter."

Peter nodded and smiled sadly. "I'm just glad you guys are talking again."

"It makes you feel good, ha?" Sirius wondered.

"Being responsible for making it all better?"

"Of course." Peter grinned again and the others laughed.

"So, what about that prank we planned…"

******************

Yes…a lighter chapter…I needed that too…

Thank you: Kaydee, GreenEyes, SweetBitter, Sporty, Emma Morgan, LilyChica378, Star, Jennie, Remy's Gurl, SodaPopGirl703, Citrus Scented, DayDreamer, Podean-Opaleye.

Oh…and my dear, dear wonderfull, amazing Amib who read something like a hundred chapters in one day…thank you! You know you're the best!! 

  



	14. Wearing off

Chapter 14: Wearing off.

The dim light from the muggle street lamp invaded the room and caused Arabella Figg to open her eyes quickly. Something wasn't right, she was sure that the window was closed when she went to bed, so where did this light come from? Rising from her bed, she slowly walked towards the door and opened it slowly. The old door cracked loudly and Arabella froze in her place.

She could hear the sound the door made.

And she could hear the sound of silent footsteps downstairs.

Slowly and quietly as she could, she sneaked her way down the stairs and watched the group of death eaters dragging her mother from the living room towards the kitchen. Her eyes widened with fear and she found that she still couldn't speak or shout for that matter. She followed the death eaters to the kitchen, hiding behind her father's invisability cloak. He received it from the ministry when he became an auror and when he died it became her only memory from her father.

The death eaters slammed her mother against one of the wooden chairs and she yelped when her body hit the hard chair. One of the death eaters lowered his hood to reveal a long pale face and bright silvery blue eyes. Arabella held her breathe, that was the man…he was the one that killed her father.

She clenched her hands to tight fists and felt her own nails digging through the flesh. She almost screamed with anger but nothing came out from her mouth.

Lucius Malfoy smiled at the tear stricken witch that sat infront of him. Her left eye was swollen and bleeding from a pounch that sent her flying to the ground and she sat there, not meeting his eyes.

"Now…Mrs. Figg…parhaps you should hear me out." He smiled.

"I know what you're doing." She spat. "You're trying to get support from the pure blood families and then he'll show his true colors and you'll betray them all."

"I honestly have no idea what you're talking about." Malfoy snorted.

"I know you convinced David Potter to join you. You promised to protect his family in return for him spying for you. But I know…I know you'll betray him and kill him eventually."

"I can see that you still have sources in the aurors department."

"David Potter is an honorble man and hates the dark arts. He will never actually join you and you know that."

"Yes, but if he ever back away from us he will be dead, and he knows that."

Elizabeth glared at him. "I won't join you, never!"

"Not even for the price of your daughter's life?"

Elizabeth growled. "Don't touch her!"

"Bring me the girl." Malfoy ordered.

Two death eaters passed the room and headed upstairs. Arabella could hear them opening and slaming doors and after a few minutes they returned and entered the kitchen.

"She's gone." One of them said.

"Where is she?" Malfoy screamed and slapped Elizabeth who fell from the chair.

"How the hell should I know?" she screamed back at him.

Lucius pulled out his wand and glared at her. "Your last chance, Figg."

"I refuse." She hissed.

He aimed his wand and grinned at her.

Arabella looked away.

"Avada Kedavra!"

The atmosphere in the common room was somewhat depressing as Sirius bothered to mention while reading a book about charms. James huffed in response and continued to burn parchments. Remus looked at him with raised eye brows and sighed.

"James, what are you doing?"

"I'm burning parchments." Came the dry reply.

"We can see that, Prongs." Sirius raised his eyes from the book he was reading.

"These are letters my mother sent me."

"I thought you're doing okay with your mother."

"Look, she's begging me to talk to my father and this is the last thing I wanna do now. I can't even think about looking him in the eye after what he did."

"Did you think that there might be a reason for what he did?" Peter asked quietly.

"Oh, Peter, don't be naive!" James exclaimed. "What kind of a reason could he possibly have? He joined Vold…" He stopped talking when he realized his voice was quite loud. "Can you even think of a reason that justify that kind of an action?"

"Maybe…" Peter mumbled.

"Well, that's crap!" James rose from his seat and headed upstairs to their room.

"I had no idea James's father is such an ass." Sirius said.

"How could you? He always hated you." Remus asked with surprise in his voice.

"I guess I just kept my distance from him." Sirius shrugged. He was about to continue when the portrait hole opened and Narcissa Avery walked inside. Sirius immidiately rose from his seat and talked to her.

"Hey, Cissa…"

She ignored him and continued towards the stairs.

"Would you stop running away from me!" Sirius shouted.

"What the hell do you want from me, Sirius?" The blond witch shouted back, her face flush and her eyes bright.

"I…" Sirius stammered a little. "I just wanna talk…explain…"

"Then go and find someone who is willing to listen!" and with those words she climbed upstairs.

Sirius stared after her with wide eyes. "Okay…" he managed to say after a while. "At least she talked to me this time."

Remus and Peter smiled at him and Sirius sat next to them on the couch. "By the way, Moony, have you talked to Bella?"

"I stopped writing." Remus tried to look like he didn't care but failed misrably.

"You know…I can't believe that for a while we were so happy and now when our girls are ignoring us we turned to misrable creatures." Sirius sighed.

"That's all you think of, ha? Girls?" Remus smirked.

The sound of the portrait hole opening up stopped the laughing in the room and the three wizards turned to look at their headmaster that looked grave and upset. His blue eyes seemed shallow and empty and he swallowed hard before he opened his mouth.

"There were more attacks tonight." The three exchanged looks of worry. "I need you to come over to my office. Bring James with you."

And with those words he left the room leaving them alone with their thoughts and fears.

**************

Sorry it took so long…I hope it was worth the waiting. This story is however, close to his ending and I must tell you that it gets harder and harder to write it…

Please Review!!

Thank you's…LilyChica378, Emma Morgan, Remy's Gurl, Star, Phoenix Arising, Leigh, Sodapopgirl703, Shadowed Phoenix, Citrus Scented, Betty, Jctigerwolf4e, krazykat.


	15. Dissappeared

Chapter 15: Dissappeared.

The usually short walk towards professor Dumbledore's office seemed longer then ever. To the four marauders it felt like they need a large supply of air by the time they reached the headmaster's oval office. James swallowed hard before knocking on the door. When they received a faint reply they entered the room slowly and each of them took in the scent of fear and worry in the room.

The headmaster ordered them to sit down and looked at them gravely. "There are things you need to be aware of as I believe those things concerned you all." He paused for a moment and then continued looking directly at Remus. "There was another attack tonight, Arabella Figg's mother was killed in a death eaters attack." Remus took a sharp intake of breathe and was about to speak when Dumbledore continued. "The problem is, that we are unable to locate her anywhere."

"What?" Remus didn't mean to sound so harsh but he couldn't help it. The thought of Arabella wandering around without being able to do anything to protect herself was almost outraging.

"What about tracing charms?" Sirius asked, putting his hand on his friend's shoulder. "I know the aurors work with them."

"Yes, it's true, Mr. Black but Arabella's…delicate condition is preventing us from tracing her with any form of magic. In her form of powers she can be compered to a squib and we are unable to trace those without magical abilities."

"Then what are we doing to find her?" Remus asked, feeling very helpless and concerned.

"There is nothing we can do for now, young man." A new voice joined the conversation and they turned to look at a tall, pale looking man with bright, alert eyes that stood in the shadows all that time. They looked at him suspiciously until Peter spoke.

"You are Alastor Moody, right? Head of aurors department?"

"Right." Moody grinned a little. "I have some news about your father Mr. Potter."

James frowned at him. "How do you know my father?"

"Your father was under strict orders to tell you nothing of his work. That's why you never knew. Your father is an auror, one of the highest in the chain of command."

James took in the news slowly. Tracing his memory for all the times his father was missing and all the lies he probably told him. And then another fact sank deep inside his gut. His father was a traitor. His father betrayed his friends.

"He was an auror." James spat bitterly.

"Yes." Moody agreed. "You need to know that your father actions will not affact the way professor Dumbledore and I see you. I know that you are almost a member in the order and we have full faith in you."

James glared at him. At this point even he didn't trust himself.

"Your father is missing, James. We tried to locate him in every way possible but we couldn't. No one had seen him since yesterday."

"And my mother?" James asked slowly.

Moody shook his head. "We can't trace her either."

James shook his head. "You have to find her. I need to get home, professor Dumbledore, please."

"I'm sorry, Mr. Potter, but you will have to stay here for now."

"But…"

"Please return to your common room, for now."

James stared at him in shock. A weird feeling of numbness enveloped his mind. He almost didn't feel Sirius pulling him from his seat and out the door. They walked quietly to the common room, somehow feeling that this is only the beginning.

When they entered the common room they sat on the one of the red couches. James sat there for a while and then complained he had a headache and went up the stairs to the dorms. When he got there he was surprised to see a face he didn't see in a while.

Sitting on his bed, smiling sadly, was Lily Evans.

He took a shaky breath and sat next to her.

For a while they sat in silence that was far from being comfortable. He heared her opening her mouth to speak several times but she never actually talked. After a few moments he turned to her.

"I am sorry, for everything I did and for all the lies I told you."

Lily looked at his eyes and smiled softly. "I'm sorry for saying that I hate you. That was never true. And I'm sorry for not listening. You hurt me. And I can't say that I fully recovered, I'm still very hurt. But I did wanted to talk."

"I thought I was strong enough to get out from the marriage but when I discovered that I was wrong I was already very much in love with you and I couldn't…couldn't tell you…I didn't wanna loose you." James swallowed hard. "Imagine my shock when I discovered it was Narcissa."

"Imagine my shock." Lily replied and he almost laughed.

"And after that formal dinner I just couldn't tell you and then I thought that I'll tell you at Christmas but it was already too late." He smiled bitterly.

"I talked to Narcissa today and I suppose we are alright with each other. She convinced me to come and see you." Lily looked at him. "You seemed concerned."

"I am." James nodded. "My parents are missing and Arabella is missing."

"What?" Lily felt panic rising inside of her. "But with the curse she has…"

"I know but there is nothing we can do for now. Dumbledore sent us back here. He wouldn't even let me go home."

"It's dangerous, James. You shouldn't be alone after everything that happened with your father." Lily touched his shoulder and felt the familiar senssation of warmth that spread all over her body. It felt so good to be able to touch him again. She missed it. She missed him.

James looked at her and then gazed at the small hand that touched his shoulder. Smiling, he touched her hand with his own and sighed. "I missed you." He whispered.

"I missed you too." She responded feeling like she was lighter and happier.

"I know that I hurt you and that it might take us some time…but I want to try."

Lily nodded and moved closer to kiss him. The kiss was gentle, almost too naive. But it was sweet and Lily smiled to herself when she left the room. Somehow she knew that things will be alright and after that kiss it felt like she could do anything in the world.

Remus woke up to the sound of Peter snoring and sat in his bed quickly, suddenly unable to hear that sound anymore. His tired eyes caught James's eyes that woke up from the same reason. They both looked over to Sirius's bed where he slept peacefully, his head (and ears for that matter) under his pillow. The two friends grinned at each other and got up to get dressed.

They walked to the great hall together and James told Remus all about the late night visit he had with Lily. Remus grinned to him and then sighed.

"I suppose it means I might have some hope." He said.

"They'll find her, Moony, don't worry." James patted on his shoulder.

"I wish I could stop worry." The werwolf smiled softly. "How are you doing?" he asked. "With your parents and all…"

James looked at him with a smile. "You do worry, don't you? I guess I'm alright." He stopped walking and looked in his friend's eyes. "Thanks for asking."

"Anytime…" Remus grinned.

They entered the great hall and took their seats next to Lily and Narcissa. Narcissa stiffed a little when Remus sat next to her and he was about to get up and seat somewhere else when she stopped him.

"Remus…" She started and then looked directly in his eyes. "I was very angry with you…Lily was too for not telling us about your…condition." Remus waited patiantly for her to continue. "And I want you to know that we accept you as you are and we don't care about it." Remus gaped at her and then stared at Lily who smiled at him.

"You have to promise us one thing." The redhead said.

"What?" Remus shifted his gaze from one witch to the other.

"We want to know more about it, from your point of view and not the books or the teachers. You're our friend and we want to know you."

Remus hesitated for a momment and then nodded his head. He was amazed with the sudden feeling of happiness that surged through his body.

"And you also have to promise that you won't snap at me like you did the day we came back from the holidays." Narcissa said.

"I am sorry for that." He said sheepishly. "I didn't mean to scare you."

"It's alright. You're forgiven."

From across the table, James smiled at him and grabbed another cup of juice. At that very momment the mail came and in that very momment Dumbledocame running from the front doors. He aimed his wand at the owls that flew around the hall and froze them all in their spot.

"May I have your attention, please." He called, his voice sounding hoarse and tired. "I have some news I think you should hear from me and not the Daily Prophet." He paused for a moment and the students felt his worry. "There are rumors…and for now they are only rumors that we no longer have control on Azkaban prison."

The collective gasp sounded like a shout of fear and parhaps someone did shout…The four Gryffindors looked at each other with worry and Lily leaned her head against James's shoulder.

"And now what?" She whispered.

**************

Okay…again sorry for the delay…I hope you like it!!

To my faithfull reviewers and readers if you have time please read & review my story **"Under** **Cover"** just click on my name…I wanna raise more support for it and I think you might like it cause it's unique…

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	16. Azkaban

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Chapter 16: Azkaban.

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"You lost Azkaban?" Harry felt like his mind was swimming and practicly drowning in the flood of information Sirius provided.

"Hey…don't accuse me, Harry, I didn't loose Azkaban." Sirius smiled a little.

"No…I meant…" Harry stammered a little and then continued. "How did this happen?"

"Well, Azkaban guards moved to the other side…literally…they left the prison, living the dementores there and then Voldemort and his followers took control."

"That's not good, I mean if you don't have a prison then where will you put all the death eaters?"

"Right, Harry, the ministry learned a lesson from that attack and right now Azkaban prison has more security then the bloody ministry itself."

"What happened at Hogwarts?"

"Well, we were on the verge of war. Many parents came and took their children home, claiming Hogwarts wasnt safe enough, the idiots…many of them were killed from death eaters attacks but Voldemort didn't dare to get close to Hogwarts so basicly it was very safe. But we bearly studied anymore, altough Dumbledore tried. And sitting like that, unable to do anything drove us mad…"

"Stop that…Prongs…stop that…that is my last warning, Potter…" Remus eyed James with warning in his eyes and waited for the black haired wizard to stop humming in a very hoarsed voice. "Alright, I've had it!"

"Remus!" Peter warned with fear in his voice as Remus rose from his seat on the sofa. James, if possible, hummed louder and Remus leaped at him, pushing him to the floor. Sirius laughed and the two boys on the carpet joined him. It felt good to laugh a little. They havent pulled a single prank since Christmas and it looked like they didn't laugh since then.

James winced a little when he moved himself from the carpet and sat up, leaning his head on one of the sofa's legs. It's been two weeks since Dumbledore informed them about his parents and Arabella and still there was no sign of them. The Azkaban Romours turned out to be the horrible truth and it seemed like there was panic everywhere.

"You know, I've been thinking…" James thought.

"That's rare." Sirius smirked.

"I think my parents might be in Azkaban." James whispered.

"What?" Remus exclaimed.

"Yeah." James said and looked at his friends closely. Peter seemed horrified and Remus and Sirius looked worried. "Think about it. Azkaban is one of the places in the wizarding world that is protected with anti trace charms. That's why they can't trace them."

Remus frowned for a moment and then nodded. "It's possible."

"Don't do anything stupid, James." Sirius warned and James frowned at him.

"What do you mean?"

"You know perfectly well what I mean, Prongs, don't do it." He said sternly.

"You sound like Dumbledore." James scolded with a smile and then turned serious again. "Don't worry, mate, I wasn't planning on barging into Azkaban."

"Well, good, now…today is the full moon, right?"

Remus nodded unhappily and sighed.

"Don't worry, mate, we'll have fun tonight."

The dark walls around the room looked like they were closing on him. Slowly killing him. He took a deep breathe that couldn't even begin to fill his lungs and sighed, being around dementors for so long caused all hope to vanish from your mind. It was like he was empty, empty from emotions, empty from needs, empty from any kind of logic what so ever.

But there was one thing that was left and it was clear as the morning sun.

It wasn't a happy thought, so the dementors couldn't suck it away from him, it was like an obssession that possesed him and tore him from the inside. It made him sick all the time, it made him cry and moan with sorrow…but it was still there, haunting him…it never stopped.

For the first time in his life David Potter admitted his mistake.

But it was too late.

All he ever wanted was to protect his family. Love or not, James was still his son and Helena was still his wife. And with everything that happened with all the attacks and his son's friends who were half breeds…he wanted his family to survive, marring James with a pure blood witch wasn't enough to secure their safety. And Malfoy promised…Malfoy promised his family would be safe.

That promise was never kept.

His wife was dead, killed within a second and he was brought here to Azkaban. Malfoy wanted information about the Order of the Phoenix headquarters but he wasn't going to talk now…no matter what happens.

The dementors kiss will only make sure that he will keep his silence…

The moon was already high in the sky when the three marauders walked quickly under the invisability cloak. Wormtail froze the whiping willow's branches and they walked inside to meet their friend. Moony seemed a little more aggressive then ever but Padfoot joked around with him and soon the wolf calmed down enough for them to travel the grounds for a while.

They had a great time running around with each other, fighting for the control, a battle the large wolf usually won and basicly tried to keep Moony busy untill sunshine. 

It was nearly dawn when the wolf smelled something. His eyes grew wide and he howled loudly. He smelled blood, fresh blood…and meat…human flesh. The soul that was inside the large wolf froze with horror and he tried to stop the wolf from going after the smell, but he couldn't, he had no control. Following his nose, the large wolf started running towards the forbidden forest. The two large animagus tried to keep up with him and then stopped with horror.

Moony was standing over the body of a young girl, growling at her with hunger. The girl didn't move and it seemed to make the wolf engrier. Remus felt his heart rate growing…oh god…please don't let me hurt her…the wolf paunched her with his paw and she still didn't move. The animagus quickly run towards him and pushed him away from the girl. Very slowly, and not without a fight, they managed to get him back into the tunnel.

By that time the sun began to shine and Sirius and James hurried towards the place where they left Peter and the girl. Peter turned towards them when he heared their footsteps, his eyes were wide and he looked terrified. Sirius and James kneeled next to him and James felt like all the air in his lungs suddenly turned to a heavy weight.

Sirius touched her cheek gently. She showed no sign of life and the horrible gush in her waist was filled with blood. Sirius almost chocked when he realized who she was. 

"Arabella?"

************

Sorry for the shortness…hey, but at least I updated fast…

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	17. James's Plan

****

Chapter 17: James's Plan.

The sound that carried itself from the common room was similar to the one of rustling parchments that flew in the wind. Lily frowned as she walked quietly down the stairs, who the hell is awake at that time of the night? Slightly smiling at her own question, she continued her quiet journy towards the common room. She stopped walking when she heared the sound of the portrait hole being open and then quietly closed.

Risking a quick glance to the common room she saw the very untidy head of James Potter as he leaned and read something. A moment later the air behind the sofa he sat on seemed to be moving as Remus Lupin removed the cloak he was wearing and sighed loudly.

"Hey, Remus." James said quietly, not bothering to lift his eyes from the parchment.

"What are you doing here so late?" Remus sat infront of him and handed the black haired wizard his cloak.

"How is Arabella?" James used the perfect diversion and Remus sighed again.

"Still asleep. She didn't wake up since you guys found her last week. She lost a lot of blood…" he said quietly.

"Don't eat yourself over that, Remus, it's not your fault." For the first time since Remus walked in, James raised his eyes to meet his. "You couldn't control it."

"It doesn't matter, I could have killed her! Even worse, I could have turn her to a werewolf like me." The werwolf exclaimed, getting up from the sofa.

"But it wasn't you, Remus, it was the wolf, you couldn't help it!" James rose from his seat and faced his friend, having the urge to grab him and shake him.

Remus growled in response and then his gaze fell on the pile of yellow parchments that covered the small table. His eyes narrowing, he picked one of the parchments and scanned it quickly. Infront of him, James sighed and sat back on the sofa, covering his face with his hands. Remus raised his eyebrows and frowned.

"What are you doing, James?" He asked.

"I have to find my parents." Came the faint reply. "I didn't want you guys to find out about this."

"This is crazy." Remus stated. "Did you honestly think you could do this on your own?"

"Well…" James hesitated. "I didn't want to show you guys because I was afraid you'll want to come along."

Remus looked at him for a moment, looking like James suddenly grew a second head and then nodded his head a few times. "Of course we're going with you." He said and scanned the parchments on the table again.

"What?" James nearly shouted and then lowered his voice and snarled at his friend. "I won't let you, Moony, you are not going with me!"

Remus raised his eyebrows and smirked at his friend and then looked to a point behind James. "Don't be a git, Prongs, we're going. Right, Sirius?"

James nearly broke his neck when he quickly whipped his head backwards, groaning with frustration as he saw Sirius's angry face. Sirius eyes shot an evil glare at him before he finally spoke. "I can't believe you, mate. Why didn't you tell us?"

"Because I knew you'd be stupid enough and want to join me." James snarled and his friends laughed at him.

"We're only following the head idiot." Sirius grinned.

"I'm Serious, you guys, it's dangerous." James sighed.

"Well, I'm serious too, Prongs and we're going with you." Sirius smiled sheepishly at the old joke and James smiled a little.

"I think you're doing the right thing, James. Despite everything your father did to you…no one deserves to stay in Azkaban." Remus said and Sirius shuddered.

James shrugged and the three of them sat down next to the table and looked at the meterial James collected in the last few days. Remus looked at a large map and a wide grin lighted his featurs. "I have an idea." He whispered and his friends looked at him, waiting for him to continue. "We can make a map…another map." He said, his voice filled with hidden meanings. James and Sirius looked confused for a moment and then Sirius grabbed the map from Remus's hands.

"Brilliant…Moony, that's bloody brilliant!"

Lily leaned against the cold wall and waited for them to speak again. She didn't risk looking at the common room since Sirius walked into the room but she could still hear most of what they said. She frowned as she leaned her head against the wall, what the hell are they planing now?

James looked awfully distant in the last days. Although they didn't exactly return to their usuall self, they did try to spend some time together. It felt like last year when they only started dating, a time when they both took things slowly and surely. It was the safest way, she decided, she doubted if she could ever forget what he did to her. A part of her wondered if they could really ever be the same again. So much has happened, it felt like their world was slowly falling apart.

A cold hand landed on her right shoulder and she stiffled her scream. She turned around quickly, ready to jump from the floor and hex the stranger. She almost laughed with relief when she saw Narcissa smiling faintly at her. The blond witch tightened her robe around her slender body and sat next to her on the floor.

"I'm sorry." She whispered. "I was worried when I didn't see you. What's going on?"

"They're planing something." Lily frowned. "It involves James's parents."

Narcissa frowned. "Those idiots are probably trying to plan a search party or something."

"Well, what ever they're doing, we can't let them do it on their own." Narcissa raised her eyebrows and Lily continued. "I've seen enough pain in the last couple of weeks and if we're going to do something then it's gonna be together."

Narcissa grinned. "Such bad words from the mouth of the head girl…"

"Shut up."

"Can you do it, Remus?" James's voice carried itself from the common room.

"I can give it a shot." Remus answered. "But Azkaban is a little harder to map then Hogwarts. We'll need a different charm to detect dementors from humens."

Narcissa and Lily stared at each other. What the hell?

The guys continued to speak and the two girls decided it was time to reveal themselves. Slowly, they crept down the remaining stairs and faced infront of the shocked marauders. James moved his hand nervously in his black hair before smiling at them.

"Hey, what are you doing up so late?" He asked.

"Oh, I couldn't sleep." Lily dismissed the question. "What are you doing?"

"Nothing." Remus rolled the parchment he was holding.

"That reply was too fast even for you, Remus." Narcissa laughed.

"Yeah, I agree." Lily nodded. "If you guys are going to Azkaban then we're going with you."

"No." James shook his head. "I won't let you."

"I am not asking you, James. I can make my own decisions and I wanna be there with you." Lily answered quickly, like she planned her answer.

"No, Lily, I don't want you to get hurt." James pleaded.

"Wasn't that your excuse for not telling me you were engeged to be married?" she asked.

James stopped for a moment before his eyes turned dark and angry. "It's not the same!"

"James, we're going and you can't stop us." Narcissa said, standing next to Lily.

"He is right, Narcissa. We don't want you to get hurt, it's to dangerous." Sirius stepped forward.

"Don't talk to me, Black." The blond witch snarled and Sirius turned red with anger.

"What the hell is your problem, Narcissa?" He asked.

"My problem?" Narcissa's voice rose and Lily backed away a little. "How dare you, Sirius? You are not in a position to make amends!"

"What are you talking about?" He hissed, his voice low.

"You know what I'm talking about! You were so upset with me for not telling you about James but you never once told me you wanted something more then sex from me! So you are in no position to boss me around!"

"Cissa…" He started and then looked around at his somewhat shocked friends. "Maybe we should talk alone?"

"No, they're my friends and you can speak infront of them."

"I was trying to be a good friend!" He exclaimed suddenly. "You asked me for it, Narcissa, I never forced you to do anything."

"A good friend?" She snapped. "You had the chance to get laid, Sirius!"

"Did you honestly think that I would do something like that without caring for you?" He asked, his voice shaking.

"It never bothered you before." She spat. "It never bothered you with all the other girls."

"Fuckit, Narcissa. Can't you see?" He exploded. "There are no other girls!" He approached her slowly, looking almost like he was beckoning a prey of somekind, looking like the black dog he could turn to. "I havent dated any girls since last year. But you just didn't give a damn…" He breathed hard for a moment before looking away from her and walking slowly up the stairs, leaving his friends and the girl he loved speechless.

***********

I should really appologize for you wonderfull readers…I just read the last few chapters and I fell like they really sucked…so, I'm sorry…

I hope this one is better…please REVIEW and tell me what you think…

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**Read my Remus's stories: The Darkest Night & Under Cover…*** 


	18. Finally Awake

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Chapter 18: Finally Awake.

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"You don't have to continue." The soft voice invaded his thoughts and Sirius shook his head. Harry looked at him with sympathy, Sirius has been staring into space for the last ten minutes, obviously reliving the story he's been telling. Harry waited quietly for his godfather to continue and when he didn't speak the young wizard started to get a little worried.

"I'm sorry, Harry, I spaced off for a moment." Sirius said quietly.

"You don't have to tell me anymore. I know who she is…Narcissa…she's Malfoy's wife, right?" Harry asked and Sirius nodded. "I'm sorry."

Sirius smiled sadly. "It's not your fault. But I feel like I have to tell you, Harry, because you deserve to know everything. The good and the bad, just the way it was."

Sirius barged inside his own room and slammed the door after him, startling a very asleep Peter. The blond wizard jumped from his bed and was on his feet in a matter of a second, his wand in his right hand. "Sirius?" He accused. "What the hell's going on here?"

"Sorry, Peter." Sirius sat down on his bed and sighed. Things definitely didn't look good. Why did he have to loose it right infront of everyone and Narcissa especially? Well, he practicly admitted, quite loudly, that he was in love with her. He groaned and lay down his head in his hands. And not only that, he admitted that he was in love with her for over a year. He groaned again and cursed loudly when the door opened once more.

James and Remus entered the room, exchanging worried glances at Sirius who still didn't look away from his hands. Peter raised his eyebrows at them and they shrugged back, waiting for Sirius to talk. When it looked like he wasn't about to open his mouth or look at them in the near future, James sighed. "Padfoot? Are you alright?"

"How could I possibly be alright?" Sirius mumbled and slowly raised his head to meet his friends worried eyes.

"What happened?" Peter asked, sitting infront of Sirius on the floor.

"I practicly shouted the entire common room that I was in love with Narcissa." He said.

"Well, it's quite late, I'm sure no one heared you." Peter tried to comfort.

"Yeah, no one was there except the three of us, Lily…and Narcissa." Sirius replied and Peter's mouth opened slightly.

"What happened between you guys?" James asked gently and Sirius averted his eyes. "Come on, mate, you know you can tell us."

"She asked me to sleep with her." He said. "She told me she wanted to be with someone she knows before her marriage. She didn't want her first time to be with a stranger and I…I agreed. I figured this was going to be my only chance ever to be with her, even if it's only…sex."

His friends looked at each other in shock and Remus cleared his throat. "And did you guys ever…"

"No." Sirius shook his head. "We planned on doing this in Christmas eve but…well, you know what happened at Christmas." He finished lamely, not really wanting to remember that night. "I just thought I could be a good friend, you know?"

His friends nodded again and he smiled faintly.

"Well, you should know that Narcissa started crying the moment you ran away." Remus informed him. "And as much as I hated seeing her crying, she might come to her sensses soon. However, I still think you need to have a serious talk with her."

"A serious talk?" Sirius grinned and Remus threw a pillow on his head, hitting right where he aimed. "Okay, I know this joke is getting old."

"Getting old?" James grinned. "It was old after the first two hours we spent on the Hogwarts express on our first year!"

The four friends laughed for a while until Peter spoke quietly. "What were you doing down there anyway?"

James sighed. "We thought of a plan to get my parents back. I think they might be in Azkaban."

"You want to get inside the prison?" Peter exclaimed. "I never met a sane wizard who wanted to do this. How do you even know they're in there?"

"I don't. But I have a feeling. You don't have to come, Wormtail."

"Of course I'm coming with you but I still think you have to be sure." Peter spoke gently. "We can't just show up over there."

"You want to join us?" Remus sounded a little shocked.

"Hey, don't sound so shocked!" The blond wizard protested. "I may not be as brave or smart as you are but you are my friends and I'll do everything for you, I mean it."

"I know, Pete, I'm sorry." Remus smiled sheepishly and Peter grinned back at him.

Remus walked slowly from defence against the dark arts classroom towards the great hall. He sighed as he heared the sound of his laughing friends ahead of him. They spoke until the late hours of the night, trying to form somekind of a plan and James started to sound more and more confidant with their plan.

The problem was, that he wasn't even half sure that they could pull this through. He had the feeling that even if they make it inside the prison, they wouldn't find anything. He had a feeling that Voldemort took no prisoners. But he couldn't tell James about it now can he? Sighing to himself he continued to walk.

The school seemed more and more empty each passing day and lots of classes were cancelled due to the latest developments but they still had DADA, and thank Merlin for that!

"Mr. Lupin?" a hoarsed voice called him and he turned to see professor Dumbledore walking towards him. Remus looked at his twinkling eyes and smiled a little. "Parhaps, you would like to pay a visit to the hospital wing, there is a young lady over there and she is quite awake…" Remus's face lited and he managed to mumble a 'thank you' to the headmaster before running of to the direction of the hospital wing. Dumbledore just looked at him, a soft smile on his lips.

Remus barged inside the quiet wing, receiving a death glare from madam Pomfry who scowled at him. He payed her no notice as he walked towards the last bed in the room. His pulse racing and his hands sweating with both fear and excitement, he pulled away the curtain. "Arabella?"

The girl on the bed raised her eyes to meet his and Remus's smile froze on his lips. She looked horrible. She was extremely weak and fragile and he just wanted to hold her to him and never let go…

"I know I look bad." He heared her voice and smiled again.

"You can talk!" He exclaimed. "How are you? I've been worried." He added quietly.

"Lucius Malfoy killed my mother." She said quietly. "He also killed my father and cursed me with that jinx." Remus's eyes widened.

"I'm sorry." He whispered.

"I just want to get better." She swallowed. "I still have trouble talking and Dumbledore doesn't believe I could use magic again." Her voice shook.

"What happened?" He asked gently, sitting beside her on the bed.

"I'm not sure how but suddenly, I could hear. And I heared someone walking in the house and I heared how he killed my mother." She shuddered and Remus grabbed her hand. "And then I ran away from home. I wandered around for a while, I'm not sure why and then I managed to sneak up to one of the trains that got to Hogsmeade and I ended up here."

"On a full moon." He said quietly, refusing to meet her eyes. "I'm sorry for hurting you." He whispered. "I'm sorry for not telling you sooner I am a werewolf." He spoke slowly, quietly, afraid of her reaction.

"I'm sorry for running away from you." She said. "I got scared. But at that night, when my mother died I knew you could never be so evil. You maybe called a dark creature in the books but I met humens who were darker then you could ever be. I met monsters…and you are not one of them."

Remus looked at her with wide eyes, a small smile on his lips. "Thank you." He whispered and Arabella smiled warmly at him. She was about to speak again when the hospital fire turned green and a few wizards hurried inside the room. Two of them carried a third man that wasn't moving and they put him gently on one of the beds. Remus and Arabella stared at them from across the room and Remus nodded to Alastor Moody who turned his head all around the wing. "Where is madam Pomfry?" He asked the young wizards.

Remus was about to reply that he didn't know when the nurse came into the room and nearly ran towards the new occupied bed. "What happened?"

"There is nothing you can do, Poppy. We broughim here so he could have some peace, if he can still feel it." Moody said quietly.

"But he is bleeding and obviously his legs are broken!" Poppy exclaimed.

"He was given the kiss." Moody said quietly and the nurse stared at him. "He doesn't feel a thing and if he does…he doesn't care anymore."

Behind them, Arabella burried her head in Remus's chest and he held her closer to him, closing his eyes and shivering slightly.

He knew the man on the bed.

No one deserved this kind of turture.

And especially not David Potter.

**************

Wow, I'm so sorry for the delay…I didn't notice it's been that long!!!

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I wanna thank everynoe who support this fic, Sorry, shoutouts next time…I just want to update and go to sleep so make sure you REVIEW and I'll write shoutouts next time!!

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	19. Goodbye Kisses

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Chapter 19: Goodbye Kisses.

James stared at Dumbledore's face, his eyes wide and empty as he registrated the headmaster's quiet words. The young wizard shook his head and cleared his throat loudly. "I'm sorry?" He managed.

"Mr. Potter, your father is the hospital wing." Dumbledore explained again but James suddenly stopped him with a movement of his hand and fled down the hall, running away. The headmaster looked after him with worried eyes before turning to the other students in the hall. "We'll be moving Mr. Potter to St.mungo's tomorrow morning. I do believe James would like to say goodbye." And with those words he left them standing in the hallway.

"Someone should go looking for him." Sirius stated quietly.

"I'll go." Lily sighed. "Can I borrow the map?" Sirius handed her the parchment and she left the hallway, heading towards the astronomy tower. Sirius sighed again and then turned towards Arabella and Remus.

"Hey, Bella, it's good to have you back." He reached out and hugged her tightly.

"Thanks." Arabella smiled and hugged Narcissa as well.

The four students stared at each other for a while. The news about James's father upset them all and they found it hard to move on. They could only imagine what was it like for James. Sighing, Remus turned to Sirius. "Up for a game of chess? We can show Arabella around as well."

"Yeah…" Sirius's eyes lited. "It's a good idea. Narcissa? Are you coming?"

The blond witch startled for a moment before nodding her head and smiling. As they climbed the stairs towards Gryffindor tower she reached out and held Sirius's hand. The black haired wizard looked at her with surprise and then smiled softly, holding her hand with his own.

James's vision was hazy and he stumbled as he ran up the stairs towards the astronomy tower. He couldn't believe what Dumbledore told him…his father was dead…worse then dead. Hot tears streamed freely down his face and he fell to the ground, growling with anger.

His father was in Azkaban! All that time. He could have saved him! No one deserved the Dementores kiss, not even the father who never loved him. "Damn it!" He screamed suddenly, hitting the wall with his fist and ignoring the hot white pain that exploded behind his eyeleads.

Incoherent words escaped his lips as he sobbed against the cold wall. He tried to stop, tried to pull himself together but simply couldn't. He was surprised when a pair of arms enveloped him and a hand removed his glasses from his face. "Lily…" He chocked.

"It's okay, James, I'm here." Lily held him tightly, wrapping her arms around him. "It's okay…"

"Why am crying?" James sobbed even harder, his body shaking. "I never loved him as a father."

"It doesn't matter, James, he was still your father. You're tied to him by blood and it has a meaning."

"Traitor." James's voice shook. "He took the dark mark." He spat bitterly.

"He was only trying to protect you. You heared Dumbledore…in the end, he wouldn't give him information."

"And look what happened to him then…might as well die…"

"James, stop that…don't talk like that." Lily whispered.

"I should have save him. We had a plan…" James turned to face her.

"Yes, you can give your plan to the order. There are many other prisoners in Azkaban that Voldemort cought…but it can't help him anymore and you can't regret this forever."

"You're right." He whispered, wiping his tears away.

"You need to say goodbye. Dumbledore said they would take him to St.mungo's soon." Lily said, handing him his glasses.

"Yeah." He rose from his position on the ground and offered her his hand. "Come with me?" He asked.

"Are you sure? I think you should do this alone." Lily said, smiling sadly.

"No, I need you to be there, please." James held her hand gently and caressed her palm.

Green eyes met his and she smiled. "Alright, you know I'm always here for you."

"You are?" He asked and she saw the insecurity in his eyes, a fading memory from Christmas and the mistrust they had. Slowly, she stood on her toes and kissed him softly, tracing his lips with her tongue. James sighed and enveloped her with his arms, allowing her to deepen the kiss.

It was slow and passionate and Lily sighed when they broke the kiss. James kissed her forehead sweetly and smiled sadly. "We should go." Lily nodded and grabbed his hand, leading him down the stairs.

"He thinks it might be better if I leave."

"I'm sorry?" Remus froze in the middle of thinking about the perfect plan to capture Sirius's queen when Arabella spoke softly. Sirius and Narcissa stared at her with wide eyes.

"Who?" Sirius asked.

"Dumbledore."

"What?! How could he even think that?" Remus exclaimed. "And where will you go? You're not well, you need to be under medical attention."

Arabella smiled. "He wants to send me to St.Mungo's. There's a new department for dealing with situations similar to mine. He thinks the healers might help me to learn magic again."

"But…" Remus looked to the ground. "When are you leaving?"

"Tomorrow…together with David Potter."

Remus nodded his head and looked down again. He couldn't believe his bad luck. He had so many things to say, how could he possibly say them all in a few hours? Sirius cleared his throat loudly and Remus raised his head and shot him a dirty look when the black haired wizard grinned at him.

"Hmm…Narcissa, why don't we move this chess game to the dorms? I'll let you play Remus's tools, he's winning anyway." Narcissa smiled with respond and hugged Arabella.

"Write to us, okay?"

Arabella hugged Sirius as well and the two wizards climbed up the stairs, leaving Remus and Arabella alone in the common room. Remus still stared at the red carpet, wanting, for the first time ever, to hit professor Dumbledore with something hard.

"Remus?" Arabella moved to sit next to him. "Are you alright?"

"Fine…" He muttred. "It's just that…I had so many things to tell you, and I don't have enough time!" He exclaimed, looking at her with sad eyes.

"You don't have to say anything." She shrugged and rested her head on his shoulder.

"Will you write?" He asked and moved his head so he could see her face. His face flushed when he realized how close they were. He could feel her hot breath tickling his neck and sensed when she stopped breathing for a moment, right before he leaned closer.

Arabella closed her eyes tightly, completely shocked at the touch of his lips. It was a soft caress, almost like he was testing her. Not sure what to do next, she moved closer and he kissed her again, sighing to her lips. He wanted to tell her so many things but all he could do was kiss her, again and again until they were both panting for air.

Arabella smiled a little. "I'll write, I promise."

"You will?" His eyes suddenly turned golden when he leaned towards her again, grinning madly.

She pulled him towards her for a kiss, feeling more sure with her actions then ever, matching him with her own smile. "Every day…"

"Goodbye."

James spoke softly, looking at his father's motionless body. David Potter's eyes gazed at his son, showing no recognition or any emotion what so ever. His chest rose and fell in slow, stable motion and that was the only sign for the little life that still remained in his body.

Swallowing a large lump down his throat, James nodded to Dumbledore and the healers carried the stretcher away from the hospital wing. The headmaster rested a reassuring hand on James's shoulder and then left the room. Lily, who stood next to him, linked his hand with her own and pulled him gently away from the hospital wing.

He didn't talk on the way towards the tower but Lily noticed the tears that ran down his face and noticed how he was trying to hide it from her. Smiling, she shook his hand a little, receiving a small shake in return and a sad smile.

James was surprised when she walked with him to the dormitory but didn't question her motives. It was very early in the morning but the room was empty. Peter and Remus fell a sleep in the common room while trying to write a DADA essay and he wasn't sure where Sirius was.

Lily pushed him towards his bed and closed the curtains behind them, muttering a silencing charm. "You're not going?" He asked suddenly.

Lily looked at him. "Do you want me to go?"

James wrapped his arms around her and pulled her under the covers with him. "I never want you to go…" He mumbled and kissed her gently, nibbling at her lower lip until she smiled to his lips and allowed him to deepen the kiss. "Promise you won't leave…" He whispered.

"I promise." She said, pulling him towards her for another heated kiss.

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And once again, sorry for not updating for so long…I hope it was worth it…

University is killing me!!

Please REVIEW and tell me what you think!

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Thanks: Tailz, Erin, Zaza, AngelOfLily, Tam, !!!, LeeLee378, LunaStar, Lightyearsaway, Natty, Star19, Sirius gyal, ElvenCherry07, Laura-Grace, Goddess of Gorgeouness, Rema, Fru Fru Snookums.

Thanx! Don't forget to REVIEW!


	20. Brothers

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Chapter 20: Brothers.

James opened his eyes slowly, blinking at the bright light. In his arms, Lily snuggled closer and sighed in her sleep. He smiled as he raised his head a little and looked at her sleeping face. Closing his eyes again, he tried to sleep some more but memories from the previous night came back to him.

They made love last night…they did it in the last place they wanted to do this. In his bed in school but it came naturally and none of them could deny the passion that claimed them. It was awkward and strange but it was real…it was love. True, Lily didn't enjoy much but he could make it up to her in the future…a grin appeared on his lips.

The future. It seemed like a strange thing for an eighteen year old to ponder about but the one thing he did learn from the past year was that life could be painfully short… and in that moment, James decided he would ask Lily to marry him. Not in that moment, of course, but he would ask her…soon…

"Is it morning yet?" Lily mumbled, hiding her face away from the sunlight.

"Yeah." James sighed. "How are you?"

Lily winced a little and smiled. "I'm alright and you?"

"Great." He frowned for a moment. "I didn't mean to hurt you."

"It's okay…you can always make it up to me…" She grinned and he leaned to kiss her slowly, pulling her towards him…melting into her…

"What are you doing here?" Sirius groaned at the happy face that were very close to his own but not enough close to keep the sunlight from hitting him straight in the eyes.

"I beat you in wizard chess last night." Came the cheerfull reply.

"You did not beat me…you used Remus' pieces it doesn't count…" He mumbled.

"Of course it is! Are you coming for breakfast?"

"Are you always that happy in the morning?" He replied, shaking his head and taking in the beautiful blond witch that sat next to him.

"Usually." She said, looking a bit hesitant.

"Only when you're with me?" He smirked and she slapped his arm playfully. "What's gonna happen now, Narcissa?" He asked, his face serious.

"What do you mean?"

"James won't marry you." He said gently. "I may be blunt and cruel but he won't marry you now that there is no one to force him to."

Narcissa gazed at him for a while, noticing the pained look in his eyes. She felt the same. She won't have to marry James but what was next? Her parents would make her marry another pureblood, it didn't matter to them who it was as long as he was pureblood.

"I don't want to break your heart, Sirius." She whispered.

"It's already cracked, mind you…" Sirius smiled a little.

"My parents would find someone else for me to marry. I doubt it would be you."

"We could ran away." He offered.

"They will find us. And when they do they would kill you. I rather marry a man I don't love and to know that you are safe…"

Sirius gazed at her for a moment before enveloping her in his arms and kissing her gently. His lips were warm and soft and Narcissa leaned into him for support, finding suddenly that she was dizzy. She kissed him back with equal passion, her hands caressing his black hair, smiling slightly at the long moan he gave.

Sirius smiled to her lips and then held her close when she burried her head in his chest. "We have now." He whispered. 

"I know…don't fall in love with me, Sirius." She said quietly.

Sirius nodded his head._ I'm already in love with you._ "I wish we had more time…"

Remus removed his black cloak and carried it in his hands. It was hot and stifling in the great hall and he needed the fresh air. He strolled casually towards the huge oak tree by the lake and sat down on the wet grass, not carring one bit about his pants. He could dry them later, after all, he was officially out of school.

It was graduation night and everyone was excited about the ceremony. James and Lily gave speeches as head boy and girl and everyone had a good laugh when dozens of fireworks exploded right in the middle of James' speech, courtsy of the marauders for a goodbye prank.

James had no idea, of course, about that one.

Now he waited for his friends to come. He asked them to meet him outside after the ceremony. His sharp ears, picked up their footsteps and their whispered words and he smiled when they sat down beside him on the grass.

"Damn…it's wet, Moony!" James exclaimed.

"What are you? Made of sugar?" Remus teased.

"No, but I have to do something important later…" He mumbled, flushing.

Remus laughed and looked at them. "I just wanted to say…that I'll miss you guys very much. "He said seriously, his voice low. "I don't think I could ever thank you enough for everything you did…"

"What are you talking about!" Sirius exclaimed. "We're your mates, you know."

"I know, but I needed to say this since it's graduation night and I know most of us have other plans then sitting here together." Remus sounded upset and James opened his mouth to apologize. "Don't apologize, James, just tell me what you're gonna do cause I made a bet with Peter and Sirius."

"What?" James exclaimed and Sirius and Peter laughed.

"Come on, James, you've been a nervous wreck for a week now." Peter said.

"I'm gonna…ask Lily…to marry me." He mumbled and Peter sighed and got a few galleons from his pockets.

"What are you nervous about?" Sirius asked. "You guys are a match from Merlin. She couldn't possibly say no."

"Thanks." James smiled weakly. "What are you guys going to do?"

"Well, I was wondering what's that gold chain you have around your neck, Padfoot." Remus grinned wildly.

"What?" Sirius quickly looked down. "How in the world have you seen it?"

"Werewolf."

"Oh…well, you might as well know." He pulled out the chain. "I got that from my uncle. It's a loan for tonight only…I just tought I might need more…time…"

"That's against hundreds of ministry rules, no?" Remus asked, touching the time turner gently.

"Yeah…well…it's immoral to force your daughter to marry someone she doesn't love."

His three friends stood quietly for a while and then Sirius turned to Peter. "And you?"

"I'm going to see that girl I went to the ball with, from Ravenclaw." Peter said, smiling happily.

Remus sighed. "I'm going to write to Arabella and see how she's doing."

"Alright then." James got up from the ground and the others followed him. "We'll see each other later, or tomorrow on the train." He said.

"Yeah." Remus was about to turn and head for the castle when Sirius' voice stopped him.

"Moony!" 

He turned to see his three friends facing him. "You know, we're not just your friends… we're brothers…"

Peter nodded. "Brothers."

Remus smiled and joined them as they stood togther in one circle. Sirius patted his shoulder and James grinned at them.

"We're brothers. Brothers till the end."

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"We're brothers. Brothers till the end."

Harry sat with his mouth wide open, gazing at his godfather with shock. "Oh…Merlin…" He mumbled.

"Well, your mother said yes and they married a half a year later. Remus and Arabella kept in touch but they had a hard time doing romance through letters. I never asked Remus about it but I think they remained friends until now." Sirius said quietly.

"And you?" Harry asked.

"I can't remember the number of times we used the time turner that night. We were very lucky we didn't catch ourselves. We had to face reality eventually and said goodbye. She wrote me a little afterwards…I felt good knowing that she's healthy… she had her son nine months later."

"You're not…you're not Draco's…"

"No…no…" Sirius smiled a little. "After they took me to Azkaban she came to see me. She was cruel and harsh in her words, telling me she never loved me and after she left I felt nothing but pain…she saved my life…"

"I don't understand…"

"I felt pain and hatred and the dementores didn't come near me…I kept my sanity in the first months, a time when I still waited for a trial. After that I learned to transform and it helped even more…"

"Are you still writing to her?"

"I received one letter after I got out. It didn't say much but she never thought I betrayed your parents and it helped to know it."

Harry gazed at him for a moment, lost in thought. "Thank you." He said eventually.

"I hope it answered some of your questions."Sirius smiled a little.

"What about Remus and Arabella?"

"You'lhave to ask him." Sirius' grin widened. "Come now…we should both go to sleep, it's a busy day tomorrow and we have to make it to the train on time."

They headed up the stairs and Sirius gave Harry a warm hug before he entered his room. "Good night, Harry." The animagus spoke softly.

Harry was a little surprised at this demonstration of affection but responded with smiled and a hug of his own. "Night, Sirius…" he looked at his godfather as he entered the room and closed the door behind him. There were still so many things he wanted to know. Maybe he should ask Remus…maybe…

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The End.

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Alright, I know it's been forever but I hope it was still good… I want to thank everyone who supported this story, those who reviewed and those who just read and enjoyed **_Thank You!!_**

You're more then welcome to check my other works:

**__**

Under Cover

The Drakest Night

Both of them are Remus' stories and I consider the latest as my finest work so far…

Thanks for the support, Bell.


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